Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He had a heart attack

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What did the Scorpio say to the Aquarius? "How's Uranus? Ohhhhh!" The Aquarius replied: "I have maggots."

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Why was the mom sad cause she had an abortion

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What do you call a homosexual with no legs or arms. Jerry

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Why did the Mexican drive the car off cliff? Because he wanted to.

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What's bigger than your penis? The Empire State Building.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was being chased by a predator and crossing the road led it away from it's pursuer.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Japan

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What do you call a man that is half Chinese and half Irish? Whatever you want, he's deaf so he won't be able to hear you anyway.

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you, me and i need to stop doing meth!

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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When is a door not a door? When it is a cup.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? It's everybody in the world telling you to stop re-using this joke.

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How many babies does it take to shingle a roof? Depends on how thinly you slice them

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Knock knock Who's there? The police your son died in a car wreck.

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how did the dead baby cross the road? it was stapled to a chicken..

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An Unicorn walks into a club, the bartender promised to quit drugs and thanks to that his family didn't fall apart and he lived happily till he was 89 when he passed away surrounded by loved ones.

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Religion

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What is brown and has 3 legs? My severely injured cat.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? Depends on how hard you throw them.

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How Many Friends Did The Ginger Kid Have? None.

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One day, a mother was talking with her three daughters. "Mommy," the first one asked, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we took you home, a daisy fell on your head." "Mommy," the second one said, "Why did you name me Rose?" "Because when we took you home, a rose fell on your head." ..."MMMBBWWAAAAAGGGHH!" the third daughter cried. She was born with severe cognitive damage and is incapable of coherent speech.

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Why was the little Latino boy sad? Because his father sexually molested him earlier in the evening.

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Q: How do you stop a baby from spinning in circles? A: Nail his other hand to the floor

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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