Roses are red Violets are blue I have multiple personalities So do I

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What did Obama do when he heard of Bin Ladins death? He informed the nation of what had happend.

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I can't see my forehead

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You know what happens when you assume. You jump to a conclusion that could conceivably have severe consequences.

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Three men of varying ethnic backgrounds jump off a building and yell different things as they fall to their death. They were all very good friends and neglected to have had a trip sitter watch them take hallucinogenics. The group of school children below the building are traumatized for a good portion of their lives.

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Where did Officer Blackman find the missing child? A shallow grave.

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Two black people passed me in an alley at night...... They said hi

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Katlin Poladian liked her own status again.

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Q: How many vaginas does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: Just one.

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Jesus said unto John, "Come forth and receive eternal life." But, John came fifth and won a toaster.

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance? He was buried under 6ft of solid earth.

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What's the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral? An Irish wedding is the celabration of two people joining in matrimony, and an Irish funeral is a somber rememberence of a deceased person.

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What did Shakespeare say to the software designer? Nothing.

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"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "For Christ's sakes, Grandma, put your pants back on!"

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A dog walks into a bar. A patron checks its tags and promptly calls the owner.

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What do you get when you put a dead baby and some nails in a blender? A dead baby and some nails

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how do you get 100 dead babies in a bucket? use a blender. how do you get 100 dead babies out of a blender? Doritio's

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Q:What happened to the leprechaun when it jumped in the water? A:It got wet.

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GRAAAAAAAR.

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Your momma's so fat: She has found a value in relationships beyond an aesthetic level.

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How do you stop a bus? Wait at the bus stop and it will stop for you.

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Potato salad

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What do you call a man that was decapitated by a stray saw blade? An ambulance until when you have a reality check and realize that in the mass hysteria of witnessing such a horrific event that this man is already dead. You then callan undertaker, his family and his friends to attend his funeral in a week or so. You then walk over to him and cry.

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What's black and white, and red all over ? An interracial couple who were both gruesomely decapitated in a freak car accident.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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