A boy walks into his friend's house for a party. While he waits for his friends to return from the bar he realizes there are many people waiting in different lines for various kinds of drinks. After his friends return he decides he does not want any of the carbonated drinks they had ordered, instead he chooses to wait in the fruit punch line. There is no punch line.

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Okay, you seem sincere enough, thing is that I trust you, but your buddies, if you can vouch for them, then I at least know that you are putting your stepmother in danger if you decide to cover for your friends, besides you being such an emotional crybaby kinda gets me into trusting you again.

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One sunny Tuesday morning, Tom and his friends were outside playing at the park. Then, suddenly, a violent storm was rapidly approaching. It was recommended that everyone should seek shelter immediately.

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You're such a baby, that you are still in diapers! Ew! How would you know creep!

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How are leprechauns and lions similar? The both start with L.

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How do my feet smell? Oh wait. They can't. Feet are not sentient independent beings and therefore cannot experience the five senses, including smell.

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What do an elephant and a can of soup have in common? They both can't ride a bike

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Jack be nimble. Jack be quick. But Jack still couldn't out run that bullet.

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What's yellow and can't swim? A bulldozer

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why did the mexican cross the road? Becuase his other one was stolen by a Black.

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A man walks into a bar and is slowly tearing his life apart. maybe because he is drinking poisonous acid instead of beer

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Q:Who has the highest K/D ratio in Call of Duty World at War A: Hitler, 6000000/1

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Why did the man scream when his dog ran into the room? Because he was afraid of dogs.

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whats white and smells like onions? an onion..

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what did Shivank say to Ricky? "you suck dick" HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAH

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What is lazy? My balls. All they do is hang.

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The little girl asks her father "Daddy why is santa fat?" "you have to exist to lose weight" he answered

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whats the difference between 10 Ferrari's and 10 dead babies ? i dont have 10 Ferrari's in my garage

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Yo mamas so poor, she should probably find a source of consistent payment to support herself.

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? HE WAS DEAD STUPID IDIOT.

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roses are red violets are blue i have five fingers the middle ones for you

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Whats red and tastes like parsley? Not Red Parsley

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What is blue and has blue shoes? A blue shoe box

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall? A:I don't know i was asking you P.S. leave your answer in the comments below :D

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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