What do you call a dear with no eyes? A no-idear

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What did the cheerleader get for christmas? Money, because she's a stupid w hore

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Why was the mohel touching the little boy's penis? Because that's his job!

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How do you get your dog to stop barking? You snap its neck.

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Pain Olympics.

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Why was the Tyrannosaurus Rex such an aggressive animal? it had short arms so it could not masturbate.

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What did the man say after jumping into a well? He didn't say anything because he died instantly after jumping head first into a dry, 20 foot well. His family mourned for three days.

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Lololol

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What's worse than falling in the mud whilst wearing a suit? Burying your parents.

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What did the boy do with his ice cream? He ate it.

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-The proceeding statement is true. -The preceeding statement is false.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Im black and want attention. I also love fried chicken and love Africa call for a good, African-American time..... Im black 4025406623

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"You must defeat Shen Long to stand a chance"

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theres a straight guy, a gay guy ,and a jew the weird part is the straight guy hits on the jew and the gay guy which make the situation all akward.

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Why did the kitten cross the road? Because its owners abandoned it.

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23 convicts were showering. One of them dropping his soap bar. The person next to him picked it up, and the one who dropped it said thanks.

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Why did the pig cross the yard? Because the helicopter was chasing him.

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A Chinese man, an Italian man and a French man are sitting in a plane. They arrive in Los Angeles with a 23 minute delay due to atmospheric conditions

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Whats worse than finding 2 worms in your apple? 2 Holocausts.

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I agree to the terms and conditions

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youre in a room with justin bieber and a gun with 5 bullets..........

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A carpenter walks into a bar. After ordering some wine he tells the bartender that one of his 12 friends will betray him. He also says that once he was captured, the government will execute him on a wooden cross for everyone to see. The bartender in disbelief says to the man "You gotta be kiddin' me, do you think you're Jesus or something?" The man throws his glass of wine to the floor, grabs the bartender by his collar, and says "Hey man, I ordered red wine, not white wine you bastard!" After a few minutes, a group of nurses escort the insane loon back to the mental clinic. The bartender never saw the man again and proceeds to sweep that mess the psycho left on the floor.

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Knock Knock. The doors unlocked you can come in. The two men have a nice conversation while enjoying a couple of beers and then order a pizza because they get hungry.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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