why didn't the printer work? it was in the toilet.

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How many dead babies can you fit in the trunk of a car? Any number if compressed sufficiently. At neutron star density all babies in the world would fit.

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Your mom's so fat that she is going to contract heart disease by age 30.

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Why was the Tyrannosaurus Rex such an aggressive animal? it had short arms so it could not masturbate.

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you see theres this guy.

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why did the snow man die? Actually it is impossible because it was an inanimate object.

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Why did the pig cross the yard? Because the helicopter was chasing him.

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troll lololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololol.olo90ololol.o.ool.olololol.ol.ol.ol.ol.ol.ol.ol.ol.ol.o.o.lol.ol.ol.ol.!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling? Because he has a great career and a loving family.

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Hah, I bet a faggot that lost his balls in the war is "above" such things as seduction and all things straight! 25 million US dollars, send them to me within a week, or I will hunt you down by tracking down every single one of your fucking followers (all six of them), and make you wish you where dead. And tell me where you live, send me your sister so I can rape her, send me your boyfriend so I can cut him to pieces, send my your children so I can make sure your genes stop, send my your mothers tits so I can hang them on my wall, and kill your father and post the shit on youtube! Maybe then we are halfway close a settlement.

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Every circle of friends has a "crazy one". If you can't figure out who the "crazy one" in your group is... Try harder. Either that or you are a terrible judge of character.

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What did the boy do with his ice cream? He ate it.

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what did the pumpkin muffin say to the blueberry muffin? nothing, because muffins can't talk.

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23 convicts were showering. One of them dropping his soap bar. The person next to him picked it up, and the one who dropped it said thanks.

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whats a muslims name with a bomb to his chest Whatever his name is HAHAHAHAHAH

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Q. Why did the little girl drop her ice cream? A. She dropped it as she got into the van

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BLACK PEOPLE! (im black so its not racist)

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Communism hehe xd

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Roses are gray, Violets are gray, I am a dog.

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Why did the black homeowner declare bankruptcy on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by continuing to pay his mortgage bills.

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Theres a tomatoe a cucumber and a mouth. HA

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Patient: Doctor, it hurts when I run, I might have arthritis. Doctor: Let me check.... 5 minutes later... Doctor: It turs out you have 3 bullets in your legs. Patient: Ohhh, I get it now.

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What do you call 20 blondes in a freezer? dinner

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penis

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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