Why did the airplane crash into the ocean? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Yanter, Look it up

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What did the lampshade say to the other lampshade? Nothing they sat in silence

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What is worse than a dog bite? A shark bite.

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What did the terrorist do to the small village? Destroy it with a bomb vest.

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A Muslim walks into a bomb shop. Unfortunately for the bomb shop owner, the Muslim was a police officer. He proceeded to arrest the owner and the employees of the store, as it turned out that the selling of these particular explosive devices were illegal. They ended up in jail, and justice was served.

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How do you know an elephant has gotten into your refrigerator? The refrigerator is lying on its side and the door is ripped off. The food is all over the place and the shelves are scattered around the floor. Your house will have suffered severe structural damage that insurance plan might not cover. Also there is a mortified elephant in you kitchen.

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What has two legs and is red all over? Half a dog.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Spilling Dr. Pepper on your carpet

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10 years ago we had Steve Jobs, Bob Hope, and Jonny Cash. Now we have?

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Dane Cook makes a joke.

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What did the towel say to the other towel? Nothing, there was no topic of conversation.

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how do yopu punish helen keller? Ground her, just like you would with any other child.

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It's yellow and you'll die when it comes into your eye. A taxi.

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What happed to the kid who survived cancer? He got hit by a plain.

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What falls down but never gets hurt? A professional stuntman wearing protective gear.

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What does a female Nazi call a tampon? A twatskika.

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What did the red bag have written on it? Yellow bag

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Why did the friendly not play outside? Because they were dead. Just like your dreams.

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Why was the man walking down the street late at night? Because he's homeless and has nowhere to stay.

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What is the difference between a Mexican and a bike? they both get hit by cars in shady neighborhoods, like Copiague, New York

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What's the difference between a BMW and a pile of dead babies? There isn't a BMW in my garage.

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A boy got scratched by a dog and nearly killed him. When he grew up, a dog came running up to him and started biting and scratching him till he couldn't handle it. Then a plane crashed into him and he died.

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What is the difference between a trampoline and a baby? You take your boots of before jumping on the trampoline!!!!!!!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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