What did the kid say to the ice-cream Man Can I have a duck please

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A hairy monster walks into a bar. It was halloween.

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Why did the chicken cross the road. ... It didn't.

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Q: Whats a spanish teacher who cant speak spanish A: duhh. it called an english teacher

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Your mom is so fat, that i don't think she's attractive anymore.

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What is brown and smells bad? A white person that had been bathed in brown paint, and didn't shower for the next month, and rubbed poop all over them, and rubbed diarrhea all over them and rubbed rock poop all over them and rubbed pee all over them, and rubbed mud all over them, and pooped in a bottle.

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Why did the blond fail her Calculus test? She had a Biology test on the same day, and being that she is a bio major she felt it would be to her interest to put more emphasis on the bio test because she is only taking cal as an advanced elective credit, which would not effect her major GPA.

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Q. What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs in front of a door? A. Matt

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Two polar bears, oddly enough, are sitting in a bathtub. One of them asks "Could you pass the soap?" The other obliges and gives him the soap.

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Why doesn't Jonathan Walk across the road? Because he is in a wheelchair...

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Robert Palmer: Doctor Doctor give me the news! Doctor: You have contracted lung cancer and AIDS. You will die before Christmas.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are red, FUCK, MY GARDEN IS ON FIRE!

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There was a curtain who sneezed and then asked you for a tissue. He was in a room with two chairs a coffee table and a 37 year old bookcase, why did he sneeze???? Because he had a cold!!????

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Why? Because she has no arms. Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Sally

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why did the kid strike out in baseball he had leprosy and his arms were amputated

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Have you heard about the awesome farmer? He was outstanding in his field. -ymda

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A chink walks into a bar. She is spotted by the secret police and instantly deported. Vote UKIP

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why did the mexican work for a lawn care service I don't know why don't you ask him

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What's the difference between an airplane and a cantaloupe? What? Wow your a dumby head.

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Who let the dogs out? The burglar, he broke the door and they ran out.

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Why did the car break down? Because breakfast was done.

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knock knock whos there **gunshot ...man that gun show next door is annoying

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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whats worse than 1 bee sting? Two bee stings. Whats worse than two bee stings? The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? Three bee stings.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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