What do you call a man in front of three trains that have explosives tied to them and that are making amazingly loud noises? An idiot who obviously can't identify danger and probably had a childhood injury that cause his life to be ruined forever most likely cause by an evil uncle.

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A doctor walks out of the delivery room, he then relieves a nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with more information. Your wife died during the delivery.

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How many Jews can you fit in a Car? 2 in the front seat 3 in the back seat 5 in the trunk and a couple thousand in the Ashtray -WSS Gaming

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What did the terrorist do to the small village? Destroy it with a bomb vest.

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What did the red bag have written on it? Yellow bag

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Why did the boy drop his lolypop Because it tasted bad

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what do you get when you combine sodium and hydroxide? sodium-hydroxide

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Dane Cook makes a joke.

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What did the lampshade say to the other lampshade? Nothing they sat in silence

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What does a female Nazi call a tampon? A twatskika.

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what did batman say to robin before they got in the car get in the car

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What did the towel say to the other towel? Nothing, there was no topic of conversation.

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What has two legs and is red all over? Half a dog.

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A Muslim walks into a bomb shop. Unfortunately for the bomb shop owner, the Muslim was a police officer. He proceeded to arrest the owner and the employees of the store, as it turned out that the selling of these particular explosive devices were illegal. They ended up in jail, and justice was served.

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What's black, green, and doesn't have to take a shower? I have no idea.

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How did the boy escape the burning building? He didn't. He burned and when to hell like everyone else.

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Two stoners walk into a bar. They didn't drive there because they were high and wanted to enjoy a cool, evening stroll.

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What's grey and can't swim? A castle.

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Yanter, Look it up

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Why did the airplane crash into the ocean? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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roses are red violets are blue i have Alzheimers but at least i do not have Alzheimers

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In the movie "Sherlock Holmes". Why is Sherlock Holmes gay???? Because he was chasing "Blackwood".

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What falls down but never gets hurt? A professional stuntman wearing protective gear.

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What did the Religious Education teacher teach on National Science Day? Religion, because that is the teacher's job.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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