whats worse than a 6 dead babies in a dumpster? You were babysitting them.

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"Knock knock." "Come in."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had legs.

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what happend when 3 white guys and 3 black guys try out for a basketball team? They all made it because you need 5 people on the team and it is good to have an extra person on the team in case some one gets hurt, fouled out, late for the game or dies.

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Q:Why did the little girl jump in the pool and drown? A:because she didn't know how to swim

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What's funny about your mom? Nothing, she died three weeks ago.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting thrown in to a car and raped violently.

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Your Mom is so fat.... When she's goes to McDonald's and orders 3 Big Macs the people standing in line behind her all look at her with disgust and a tinge of pity.

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A plane crashes on the border of canada and america, where do you bury the survivors? I lied there are no survivors and the bodies were incinerated by burning jet fuel so theres nothing to bury.

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the other day i was walking down the street and saw a black man carrying a tv. i thought to myself, "hey that looks like mine!" but then i was like nawwwwwww, mine's at home...... shining my shoes -_-

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Whats worse than getting shot? Getting shot twice.

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What do you call the offspring of a gerbil and a hamster? Whatever you want.

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What's the difference between a duck and a bicycle? They both have handlebars. Except for the duck.

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Why can't black people swim? Because there are sharks in the lake.

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Why was the Irish Cop happy to see the Mexican family killed in a accident? Because the Lopez family were a family known for generosity and selflessness. It came as no surprise to anyone who knew Steven Lopez and his beloved family that they were all organ donors and not only that but Shelly Lopez, Steven's oldest daughter had blood type O negative (the universal donor). Officer McO'Brianiganly's wife is dying in the hospital in need of a kidney transplant, doctors have given her just weeks to live. Now, thanks to unfortunate events for la familia Lopez., Officer McO'Brianiganly and his wife can live a long happy life together, just as they always imagined.

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A man comes home after a long days work. It is late at night and he gets in bed with his wife who is already asleep. Later that night he gets up for a glass of water and returns to the bed room to see that his wife doesn't appear to be breathing and calls 911. He then realizes that this isn't his house and he leaves.

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You can pick you're friends, you can pick you're nose, but you can't run over a pedestrian.

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Why was the little girl crying? There was a frog stapled to her forehead.

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Rick Ross is so fat, that he is fatter than someone who isn't as fat as he is.

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What's cold, tired, wet, and starving? A girl up at 4:00 am that just came out of a cold shower.

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what does pedobear get for christmas ? nothing he's the one giving love to all kids .

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Q: What did the doctor say to his wife? A: Penis.

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What do you call three Asian people eating a cat? A tragic last resort for a starving family.

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Justin Beiber walks into a bar. The bartender does not serve him because he is not the legal drinking age yet.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops