How do you know if an elephants been in your fridge? It's completely destroyed.

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360 NO SCOPE

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What's green and has wheels? grass... i lied about the wheels

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How do you stop a air plane? You throw small infants into the turbine.

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Yo mamma so stupid... She's considering going to college to get a better education

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Sam murray got home after school one day, he siad hello to his father and possibly played some Avatar on the D.S

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Did you hear about the man hear about the man who lost an arm and a leg in a car accident? He's alright now.

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How did the black guy, get a nice car, house, and attire? He went to college, and got a job.

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Do not use your phone, I repeat DO NOT USE YOUR PHONE, at this point we do not know enough, as for this kid, he is about two minutes from getting his ass locked in a nice prison, I told them he does not know anything, and I will make sure he does not squeal, you should be good, even if I got to take care of him.

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A: Knock Knock (pause) B: Please use the doorbell, it is very late and I like to be considerate of my neighbors

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A small mexican boy saves up enough money to buy his very own skateboard. His mother is dead.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Not your grandma! Cause she's dead! Come to the funeral

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Why should you never shower with a pokemon? Pokemon is a game for children. In doing so you would greatly disturb your child who is quite fond of pokemon

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A man carrying a bucket of golf clubs walks into a bar with a blonde, a brunette, and an asian. His name was Tiger Woods.

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why is lady gaga so famous? because she has a penis.

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Three men walk in to a bar, One ducked

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Why did the blonde ask her doctor if she could get a new butt? She is insecure about its appearance and believes reconstructive anus surgery is the only solution.

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Q-How do you kill an elephant? A- An elephant gun Q- How do you kill a blue elephant? A- A blue elephant gun Q- How do you kill a red elephant? A- Strangle it until it turns blue then use a blue elephant gune Q- How do you kill a purple elephant? A- Don't be ridiculous purple elephants don't exist

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A couple picks up a hitch-hiker with an ax on the side of the road. The hitch-hiker says "Thank you for the ride."

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You know what's a real drag? A club foot

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Hey guess whats funny? Matthew Mcconaughey Oh wait, never mind

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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What did the paraplegic say when he walked? Nothing, paraplegics can't walk.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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