Why did the chiken cross the road? idk, i can't talk to chikens

Where is boots, Dora asks Why the hell are you asking me when your the one who is with him.

My Jimmy Saville advent calendar is rubbish. It only opens from 1 to 16.

"Ask me if I'm a tea pot" "Are you a tea pot?" "No" Try this on your friends

What's worse than a dead baby inside a microwave? A microwave inside a dead baby.

You know what topping goes bad with ice cream? Chloroform

Why was the uneducated black guy raped? To make this joke more risky and therefore funnier.

What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick.

What's small, black and at the top of a burning building? Oh shit - I forgot my baby

Knock Knock Who's there? Your mom. Just kidding, it's the pizza guy. Pizza guy who?

Why is 6 afraid of 7? 7 is a terrorist.

A nun, a jew, and a black walk into a bar. The bartender says "What is this, a joke?"

"Knock knock," said the guy about to deliver a knock knock joke.

Can a match box? No, but a tin can.

What does a gay horse eat? Low-energy foods should only be fed to horses who are not regularly being worked and participating in high performance. According to the University of Kentucky's College of Agriculture, energy is vital to horses who need to perform their best as it aids many of the body's functions including muscle contraction, respiration and circulation. Only feed a low-energy diet to an idle horse and feed a high-energy diet to an older or sickly horse and to a working horse.

Q: If you are debating whether to smoke marijuana, consider: what will your mother say when she finds your corpse? A: As a relatively harmless and non-addictive substance, Marijuana was most likely not the cause of my child’s death. It was probably AIDS.

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? Physics. Why did Tommy fall of his bike? He was hit by 3 monkeys and a refrigerator.

Q:What's colorful and waves like a flag? A: A flag.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven hundred and eighty nine.

A girl said to her boyfriend, "you take my breath away." The boy said, "that isn't possible" and they proceeded to have sex.

Roses are red, Violets are microwaves, I have amnesia, Roses are red.

- Knock Knock. - Who is it? - I am - I am what? - I am dying please help me. - Sorry, I don't speak with strangers.

Question: What is worse then a worm in your apple? Answer: A number of different things I would imagine...

What's worse then the bomb that went off in boston? The second one right after.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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