How much does a polar bear weigh? It depends, but most weigh around 775 to 1,200 pounds.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard you throw 'em.

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What do u call a white hourse with no ass Penelope

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knock knock who's there? banana well that's an odd name. banana then began to break down in tears because his parents were constant drug abusers and gave him that name while they were high

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Q: Why did the mugger kill the bus driver? A: Because he had a gun.

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Knock Knock Who's There? Ted. Oh, Hey Ted.

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Why did the old man lose his cane? He didnt. He had alzheimers

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Son: i like gaming Mom: you are wasting your life *son jumps in trash can

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Why was Ethan talking to the potato? Because he is stupid.

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Why's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into a worm and finding a golden ticket

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knock knock - whos there whos there -"im confused" try it on someone

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whats bad about being black and jewish they have to sit in the back of the oven

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Why was the blonde walking funny? She had a ten foot long metal bar shoved up her butt, and it was very painful to walk.

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Friends are a lot like trees They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe

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A redhead walks into a bar and goes to the restroom. She needed to pee.

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What did one tree say to the other tree? Nothing, trees can't talk.

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Roses are niggas Violets are niggas I'm lil Wayne niggas rhymes with niggas

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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If little jimmy has five candy bars and he eats three, what does little jimmy have? Diabetes

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Why did Sally fall off the tree? Because Sally weighed 500 lbs and it was a bamboo tree.

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What do you get when you add two boys and two girls in a basement? Four people fearing their lives during a tornado.

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What did John say to Tim Hi I'm John

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What did the purple dragon say to the unicorn? He doesn't say anything to the unicorn because dragons and unicorns don't exist. Even if they did exist, dragons and unicorns can't talk, unless we're talking about cartoons. Also, even if it was a cartoon or whatever, do you really think a purple dragon has ANYTHING to say to a unicorn?! Of course not! Oh look at me I'm a cool talking dragon, I have something so important to say to this unicorn. Gimme a break...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops