how do you make a plumber sad? Kill his family

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How Do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open the door put the elephant in and close the door. How do you put a giraffe in a fridge? Open the door take the elephant out put the giraffe in and close the door. The lion king has a meeting with all the animals but one doesn't turn up, which one is it? The giraffe because it's still in the fridge.

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Whats green and has wheels? A green car.

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why cant the blind man read brail? he has no fingers

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what did the brick say to the other brick? hello. the guy next to the bricks was shocked and went home and killed his wife then later higherd an indian man to give him a lapdance.

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Q: what is the best way to pick up jewish chicks. A: with a pickup line and possibly a gift such as chocolates or flowers

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Hellen Kellers dad put a plunger in the toiler and left it there. Hellen Keller went to use the bathroom and.. moved the plunger so she could take a shit.

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Why does no one like fat people? Because of Jesse Ziegenbein

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What's black and white and red all over? A domestically abused bi-racial woman.

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What do you call an blonde, brunette, and a redhead? There has yet to be a definition for a group of people categorized by hair color.

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Why did a man throw butter out the window ? So he could see butter fly and then realized that there was one on window cil

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teacher:humpty dumpty sat on a wall.... me: wait, why was he up there ms.park? teacher: well hes never been the same since vietnam, his wife divorced him and now hes a raging alcoholic.

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Anti-Joke is a sticky wicket.

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Q: yugdyijgdripgdghd A: sorry I'm retarted. I don't know wtf I'm doin

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Roses are red, violets are blue, twilight is gay and Justi Bieber too.

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Why did Bruno Mars explode? He caught a grenade for ya.

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What Did The Kid With No Arms And No Legs Get For His Birthday? A Walking Stick

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What's funny about a car accident involving three children, a widow, and a dog? Nothing.

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Nero? As In Nero7? Septimus? Where you not killed during the raid? I read you got tortured and killed by your own out of mercy.

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What did the dinosaur say to the centipede? Its funny cause the dinosaur is big and the centipede is small. Also dinosaurs can't even talk!

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Why couldn't Jesus get a driver's license? Because automobiles did not exist 2000 years ago.

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How does a chubby baby eat his chili In a very chubby way with his hands smearing it all over is face

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what do you call Tim Tebow on a bike with a clown hat on? Tim, Mr. Tebow whatever you want

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how do you kill a man? slowly saw off all their limbs and then jump up and down on the torso and let all the organs fly out

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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