What is pink and fluffy? Pink Fluff.

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How do you tie your shoes underwater? In a submarine

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a black guy and a mexican are in the backseat of a car, who's driving the car? the owner of the car.

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a man killed wife. he successfully rid the scene of all evidence and buried the body under a bridge. unfortunately he forgot to bury the head and went to jail for life.

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I got shot, you laughed

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your amazing just the way you are... even though you have aids.

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What's that smell? Your grandmother being burned alive.

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Q. What do you call a bear ripping a man to pieces? A. A bear.

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Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere

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do you know a really good joke? i don't have one.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a skank.

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Q: What do you call a gray box without a joke in it? A: I don't know but you'd better think of something.

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Andrew Wang getting a girlfriend.

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a mexican is walking through the desert with no food or water, and no clothes. he'll probably die soon.

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What is brown and tasty? A brownie.

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An Englishman, Irishman and Scotsman walk into a bar. It happens frequently at UK airports.

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Q: How did the girl in high school become so popular? A: She got pregnant

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If life hands you lemons Take them

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A priest, a Rabi, and a Monk walk out of the bar and go home.

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What did the handicapped boy say to his mother? Nothing, his severe mental retardation impaired his ability to learn the English language.

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How do you make a bird drop a worm? Wring it's neck. P.S: If that anti-joke didn't persuade you to vote thumbs up for this post, then perhaps these delightful lyrics will convince you otherwise. I see them staring back at me They know my name The faces in the sky are looking for something more My friends have paper smiles and laugh at me in all my trials Their eyes are everywhere and see everything what do They need me And I need them See me And I see them Within The lines they've been burned in my mind It all ends so violently I know My sweet pareidolia It all ends so painfully and slow My pareidolia My friends have hollow eyes They're made of shapes and curvy lines Their eyes are everywhere and see everything what do They need me And I need them See me And I see them Within The lines they've been burned in my mind It all ends so violently I know My sweet pareidolia It all ends so painfully and slow [. From: http://www.elyrics.net/read/e/elena-siegman-lyrics/pareidolia-lyrics.html .] My pareidolia The loneliness is only missed when I am alone O yeah I might try to find my light tonight Hide my sight from eyes I try to fight My nine eyes of light die by the blight Ride white knight unite my plight tonight They're inside me They're inside me I'm inside out I'm inside out They're all around Within without Within without They're inside I'm outisde They're all around They're all around They're inside me I'm inside out They're all around Within without It all ends so violently I know My sweet pareidolia It all ends so painfully and slow My pareidolia la lalala lalala lalala lala

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What's worse than 20 babies stapled to one tree? One baby stapled to 20 trees.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Actually they are not, they are purple. Whoever the uneducated idiot was who made up that poem deserves nothing more then a slap in the face

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Why was Billy sad? An evil clown hit him with an Axe.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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