There once was a man from Nantucket, but he's dead.

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How you make a duck cry? Raping it. How you make it shut up? Killing it. Why did no one helped the duck? Because the duck has no friends.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because his parents died.

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What's worse than being raped? Being raped after getting raped.

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To whomever it may concern, You are currently reading this anonymous letter from someone anonymous. I’m currently watching you read this letter. I am not a threat. I am not Big Brother. I am someone anonymous. You will never find out who I am. You may have a few ideas of who this might be, but you will be wrong. Just know that I am watching you. That is all. I love you. All for Jesus -A

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Why did Susie fall off the song? She had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? Not Susie

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What's worse than being human? Nothing... No I literally mean nothing at all. Like not being anything?

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An Irishman walks into a bar and orders a Coke.

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I hate you.

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what is sam ross' favorite word to use in conversation? awesam

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what do you call a pizza with a lot of jalapenos. spicy.

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How do you stop the neighbors kids jumping your fence and stealing your lemons? Molest them.

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What did batman say to robin before they got in the car Get in the car

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Why did polly fall of her swing ??? She had no arms

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Why did Hitler go to the hospital? Because he shot and poisoned himself.

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What side of the cheetah has the most spots? -The outside.

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how did the bling man cross the street? He didn't half way there he tripped and got ran over by a car.

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Why don't seagulls live in the bay? Because then they'd be bagels

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Knock Knock Who's there? Hodor

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What was the latino gardener doing? Working hard to keep his job in these tough economic times.

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wat do call a joke thats funny a funny joke

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Whats big, hairy, and super long? My big toe you pervert.

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a Mormon knocked on my front door three times, and i took three seconds to answer, whe shook hands for three seconds. how many dead kittens can fit in my blender?

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was deaf and blind.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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