WHat is the one thing an alcoholic needs everyday? Rehab.

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How do you make a baby cry? You hit it in the face with a hammer.

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Dying of terminal cancer.

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So a baby seal walks into a club.

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Q: What's annoying and doesn't smoke? A: AIDS

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How do you make a Fireman cry? You kill his family in a fire.

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Why did Hitler smell the flower? Chicken dick.

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How many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb? One, it's just a lightbulb

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Q: What do you call a unicorn on a mountain? A: Freaking sick.

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There are four worms moving in a straight line, one in front of the other. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied.

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Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: It doesn't matter, the lightbulb never went out in the first place.

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Kate

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What does the time bomb say to the idiot? Nothing, time bombs are inanimate objects and therefore can't speak.

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What do you call a contraption made of a wooden rod attached to three strings attached to three rocks? A completely useless and pointless invention.

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Jess Burns

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Why do Chinese people smell? Because of their ethnicity...plus, they smell.

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what's worse than two dead babies? three dead babies.

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What do you get when you give a homeless man a sandwich? It thrown at the back of your head.

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Q: Why did the boy cry? A: He was denied access into heaven

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Knock Knock! we have a door bell ...ding dong. its broken.

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Q: what do you call an icy road? A: dangerous

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why did the chicken cross the road

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What makes the world go round? Gravity.

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what is white and if it falls out of a tree it will kill you? a refrigerator.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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