You know, dark humor just isn't everyone's cup of liquiffied dead baby.

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A dad is very proud of his son for just having graduated preschool. he tells him son, ill get you anything you want. he says i want a pink pingpong ball. the dad is confused but he does it anyway. the next year, he graduates kindergarten. the dad asks the same question. the son this time says i want 10 pink pingpong balls. so the dad, very confused, does it. 5 years later, he graduates elementary school. this time he says 100 pink pingpong balls. high school the dad says cmon your going to college ANYTHING! A CAR? A HOUSE? no i want 1,000 pink pingpong balls. the kid then goes to college and 4 years later and majors in african relief. the dad is very proud but he says. lemme guess? 10,000 pink ping pong balls? YEP. the kid goes to africa to help out because he's a good person. he then meets his wife helping out there also. they get married and the dad flies out to africa to see the wedding. he then knows that he needs 100,000 pink pingpong balls shipped in. the dad goes back to the US and 9 months later finds out that he is a grandfather. he ships 1,000,000 pink ping pong balls into africa. a few years later he finds out that his son contracted a rare african disease and is going to die very soon. now the father is deeply in debt from all the ping pong balls, so his community helps him raise money to go to africa. he meets his son on his death bed. and they talk for a long time. the dad finally says. yknow son i really need to ask you, why did you ask for all those ping pong balls? the son says: "Well dad, I--" and then he dies

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How do you stop the neighbors kids jumping your fence and stealing your lemons? Molest them.

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One penguin says to another penguin, "It looks like you are wearing a tuxedo." The other penguin says, "Yea, I have to go to dinner party later."

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So a baby seal walks into a club.

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What do you call a mix between a beaver and a mammal? You can't mix beavers and mammals, and even if I had said a platypus that would not have been funny.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? Answer: A Pilot

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Hey dude ask me if im a tree!? Are you a tree? No

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What's red and silly? A blood clot

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What does the time bomb say to the idiot? Nothing, time bombs are inanimate objects and therefore can't speak.

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what do an elephant, a fishook, and a spaceship have in common? absolutely nothing

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a 12 year old walks into a bar she orders a drink and dies she then walks out of the bar

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Your mom.

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Hitler walks into a bar and is shot on sight

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house?  No Neither has he

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A kid is Jackin off and his dad walks in and says if you keep jackin off you will loose your sight. the kid says dad im over here.

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Chocolate rain Awesome!

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was black.

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An Arian man walks into a German-owned bar and asks to use the restroom. The bartender sees this acceptable and allows it. Soon after, a Jewish man asks the same question, but this time the bartender said no. The Jewish man thought it was an outrage and demanded why, so the bartender calmly explained to him that the Arian man was still using the restroom and that when he was finished the Jewish man was free to poo as he pleased.

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a man killed wife. he successfully rid the scene of all evidence and buried the body under a bridge. unfortunately he forgot to bury the head and went to jail for life.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Japan.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He didn't. He slowly ate it on a warm day although it's taste was somewhat of a disappointment.

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Why did the rooster chase the chicken? - They were playing tag!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Why did German shower heads have eleven holes? Because jews only have ten fingers.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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