Knock knock... Whos there? The IRS, we are taking your house.

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What's the difference between a zombie, a vampire and a werewolf? One is a zombie, one is a vampire and one is a werewolf.

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What did the little girl get for christmas? her first period

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Q. Where do polar bears vote? A. The North Poll

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What do you get when you mate an elephant with a rhino? Not much of anything except inter-species animal sex, considering the fact that the two do not share enough genetic material to create any sort of offspring.

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what do Asian people eat? what Asian people eat.

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" I can't here you it's too dark!"

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Why did the cat fall out of the tree? Cause the branch broke. Why did the baby fall out of the tree? Cause it was stapled to the cat.

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? Because he wasn't invited.

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A joke

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What do babies and caterpillars have in common? They're both dead. Except the caterpillar.

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I have a left shoe. I have a right shoe. I have two feet

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Why did Jill come "tumbling" down the hill after Jack broke his crown? She fell running on a hill, essentially why Jack broke his crown.

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blubber vaginass CC

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Why did the Russian take a boat ride? Well this isn't possible because we all know that in Soviet Russia, boat ride you.

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Dana Cohen not having herpes.

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"You know what they say about people with big swords." What do they say? Man that's a big sword.

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Three men sat at a pub, it reminded them of this joke they once heard

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A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

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What's the difference between a screwdriver and DJ Pauly D? One's a tool and one is an inanimate object.

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Womens Sports

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Global Warming.

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What's black and white and red all over? A post-racial communist country.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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