what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

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An asian walks into class to take a math test. He did not study and consistently misbehaves and promptly fails.

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What did little Suzy get for Christmas? Molested

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Adam eats ginger nuts the fookin chicken

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what do you call a clown in makeup? a clown, clowns are supposed to wear makeup.

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What do you get when you cross a Minotaur with a snowman? A cold mythological creature.

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Your mom's so fat that when she stepped on the scale at the doctors office the doctor said " hey i wanted your weight not your phone number"

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Knock Knock! Who's There? Tourettes Kid. Touret- FUCK SHIT!

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A jumper cable walks into a bar. The bartender says, "I'll serve You, but don't start anything."

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What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife? 45 pounds. My girlfriend was a fatass. Wasn't gonna make that mistake again when I found a woman to marry.

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What's red and invisible? No tomatoes.

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What do you get when you cross a computer with a whore? A:porn

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An American, a Canadian, an Afro-American and a Jew walk in a bar. They all order their favorite drink and go look for potential partners with whom they'd wish to engage in sexual relationships.

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An animal entered my house tonight ! It could only be one thing : A bear or a dog.

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What did Superman get for Christmas. Nothing as he likes to stay detached from society.

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mohammed ali walks into a bar, gets a drink, signs a few autographs , and a good time is enjoyed by all.

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What's the difference between Newt Gingrich's cat and a hand grenade? Gingrich's cat is a domesticated quadriped mammal, a hand grenade is a small bomb that can be thrown by hand

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why did u put your iphone in the blender?!?!? because i wanted to make apple juice..

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Knock knock. who's there? Banana. Banana Who? Knock KNOCK!!! WHO IS THERE!!! BANANA!!!! BANANA WHOOOOO!!! Banana Johnson....... I'M YOUR NEIGHBOR!!!!

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"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Will farrow now gimme your hentai"

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his kids.

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What starts with P and ends with O-R-N? Porn

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Roses are red Tulips are blue Wait, no sorry That's violets.

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Shut up, I already got that before you said it, typed it, whatever I do not give a fuck, I want the last word because, reasons of millions. I love you Nero come visit me sometime, wait ill come visit you, yes yes, but now shut up, I want the last word, because I made myself your bitch! You know its not what I mean the other way but then around again, I think, you are my I made myself your bitch, no wait, keep reading, you are, my bitch master..., pretty please let me have the last word? Never fucking mind! Have the last word, I surrender, I totally surrender I want my nose back XD.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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