*Science Teacher goes into his class* Teacher:MR MCAAAAAAAN! What's the answer?! MrMccann: I dunno sir. Teacher: WHAT DO YA MEAN YA DUNNO?! HAVE I EVER ASKED YOU A QUESTION YOU DON'T KNOW THE ANSWER TO?! MrMcann: No Teacher:Then answer this. JOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN DO YOU KNOW THE ANSWER?!

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Bob was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was really angry. She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds and it better be there!!" The next morning he got up early and told his wife to come to the driveway. He quickly pulled out a .44 Magnum and murdered her violently. The marriage had been a nightmare ever since they lost their unborn child, and the situation pushed Bob to a place, where he could no longer look at his wife.

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What did the black guy get from his white girlfriend for valentines day? An HIV positive test result.

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What happened to the boy who ate too much? He got type 2 diabetes

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Why are women such horrible drivers? Their hair gets in the way.

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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Answer: because he had no guts

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Hi I'm makena. I'm a cynical asshole

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So a Mexican a Jew and a Philippino walk across the street What Happened? the border patrol shot them

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Q: What do you call a pig with wings? A: Pigs don't have wings.

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What's the difference between unicorns and black people? Years of slavery.

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Why was the tree sad? Because a bird shat on it.

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dalas rof rezilitref taerg a si citsalp. Read it from right to left.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I tryed to hang myself But my neck qad to fat

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what's the difference between a lion and an ostrich? they are both birds, a part from the lion

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Ask me what my favorite color is. What's you favorite color? Blue.

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Knock knock Whos there You spelt who's incorrectly You spelt whos incorrectly who ...................

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Why was the black man hanging from the tree? He fell and had to grab a branch.

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why did the 42 inch plasma screen blow-up 6 hours before the england match ? because it knows .

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What do lawyers and sharks have in common? They both play vital roles in their own society or ecosystem.

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Why did a black man enter a KFC? Because he had been in town a while and had grown hungry over the period of walking around, and decided he should get some food to satisfy his hunger so he may continue his journey around town. The fact he entered KFC is purely coincidental, as he could've easily decided to go to a different eatery, but it just so happens that the closest one was a KFC.

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Q: Why did your mom cross the street? A: Because she was so ugly that she fell off both sides of the bed

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Your mother's so fat that when she goes through rotating doors, the doors rotate around her.

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what are you your not a human? are you an other?

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What did one door say to the other door? Nothing, cause doors don't talk.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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