What did the tide say to the sea?ANSWER-- Long time no sea. LOL Issaiah from OHIO yolo

thumb_up thumb_down -21

don't take life to seriously nobody gets out alive

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What do you call two black men flying an airplane? Pilots.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What's worse than burning your bacon? Finding your daughter decapitated and raped in the basement.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

a man walks into a bar he suffer's bad injuries by Mad

thumb_up thumb_down -21

How many people does it take to paint an elementary school red? 27.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What's worse than a spilled ice cream cone? 2 spilled ice cream cones. What's worse than 2 spilled ice cream cones? 3 spilled ice cream cones. What's worse than 3 spilled I've cream cones? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? 4 spilled ice cream cones.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

So once upon a midnight dreery.... In a galaxy far far away that takes place in the past but resembles a technologically advanced future, an evil sith overlord took an innocent Jedi knight and turned him in a cybernetic killing machine. In the end, he dies

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Two elephants were in a bathtub. One elephant asks the other "pass the soap?" The other elephant passes him the soap and they continue with their bath.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What's worse than nailing 10 babies to one tree? nailing 1 baby to ten trees.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What do you call a black person who was in the U.S. army and survived WWII? A veteran, considering he fought a war and is still alive.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Q: What was the last thing to enter the bug's mind as it flew into the windshield? A: His back legs.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What does the fox say? Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding!

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Roses are red, Violets are blue, This poem doesnt rhyme And your entire family died trying to fly to your house for Christmas. They crashed into a orpanage for death children. There were no survivors.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why was Joseph Kony at a primary school ? It was 3 o'clock and his children had just finished a long hard day learning to read and right and it was his turn to pick them up after him and misses Kony developed a schedule one late night after the odd glass of wine or two.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why did the goose cross the road? Because the chicken was on vacation

thumb_up thumb_down -21

A farmer hears a knock at the door on a rainy night. He opens the door and welcomes an attractive young man in. The farmer gets his budding teenage daughter to fetch the man a towel. He dries himself off, thanks them both, and goes to bed. He's gone before anyone else wakes up and leaves a fifty on the table.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Mommy how come daddy went to the doctors today? Well sweetie, honestly daddy wanted me to shove things up his ass And I refused to so he went to the doctors so they can do it...

thumb_up thumb_down -21

your mom is so stupid that she is suffering from down's syndrome, and has a shorter life expectancy than normal people.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Q. what did the hobo say to the rich guy A. nothing the hobo wa a mute

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What do you call a man with leaves on his head? Steve, he's on camouflage training in the Army.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

God Nero, Marry me now! I removed the nose thingie but it wont stop.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? The first is a person of the Jewish Faith and the other is a popular item of food.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

girl. have you seen my duck man. yes he is with me right now girl rely you have him man. yes in my diner girl. d.i.c.k. man.f u

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops