Knock know! Who's there? Aids! Aids who? Aids! Aids who? Orange! Orange who? Orange you glad I'm not aids!

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Why am I constipated? I ate fiber glass insulation.

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What did Michelle Obama get for Christmas? Cancer

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what's bloody and sweet? A squashed mosquito sprinkled with sugar.

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Why did the mexican mow the lawn. Because the grass in his front yard is longer than he likes it .

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This one time, at band camp, I played the trumpet.

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A man bought a white van, He later brutally molested a small boy.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To reach his desired destination.

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When does 1+1=3? When the condom fails.

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what do call a car full of people on the side of the road? a cool explosion waiting to happen

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wat did one chicken say to the other bock bock

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it died.

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A guy walks into a restaurant and sits down only to realize he is not wearing any pants. Immediately the police are called and arrest the man for indecent exposure. Given there were children in the restaurant at the time, the man is also charged as level 3 sex offender and is held on $100,000 bail. His family receives the news and become the talk of the town. His wife commits suicide from embarrassment, leaving her 10 year old son up for adoption who later gets involved with drugs due to his rough childhood.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Probably because this chicken had a mental disability and saw on the news that there was a hospital on the other side of the road that could treat his illness and possibly save his life, allowing him to fulfill his life-long dream of retirement. But knowing that chickens do not possess the brain power capable of understanding the situation that this chicken was in, it had probably gotten lost and just wandered off.

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Why didnt the 14 year old get her period? Because she had gotten pregnant by her father

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Why is Jesse so fat? A horse, Because a cow gives milk thus creating pee wee Herman to jack off at an astonishing speed

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A stand-up comedian quits his job. He has social anxiety and can't stand the pressure.

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Guy: do u wanna hear a joke about my dick? Nah its to long Girl: Do u wanna hear a joke about my vagina? Actually that would make me very self concious I have ghonorrea and would appreciate not having to tell one.

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mario squashes another goomba when his wife hears of this he kills her 3 children with a gun and hangs herself.

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What do you get when you cross a chicken and a turkey? Just a sort of mixed bird thing.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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Why couldn't the boy in the wheelchair sue the man making fun of him? Because he couldn't get up the stairs to court.

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Why did the black man fall off the building? The building was one of the twin towers and the event 9/11 was currently happening and he saw one of the planes coming at him so he decided to jump to his misery instead because he thought it will hurt less, also he thought that if he waited for the plane to hit him there is a possibility that one of the wings may hit him right on the neck and his head will get chopped off and he wanted to die with his body completely attached.

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A bar walks into a man and the man walks into a watermelon then the watermelon walks into a black guy then the black guy walks into a piece of fried chicken then the piece of fried chicken walks into a hotdog then the hotdog walks into a wall then the wall walks into a horse then the horse walks into a jar of mayonaise then the jar of mayonaise walks into a can then the can walks into the bar

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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