mohammed ali walks into a bar, gets a drink, signs a few autographs , and a good time is enjoyed by all.

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what do eagles and moles have in common? they both live underground except for the eagle!

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what did the doctor say to the wery fat man? you have diabetes

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Do ya like waffles? Ya we like waffles.

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What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa? Tiger woods is a famous golf player and Santa is a fictional old man dressed in red and white who is said to live in Lapland, have an airborne sleigh driven by eight magical reindeer and come down the chimney to fill childrens' stockings on Christmas eve.

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Why didn't the boomerang return? It hit a baby

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whats worse then getting a bad present on your birthday? dying.

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Knock, Knock. Who's There? Its Greg. I forgot my keys, can you let me back in?

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How do you make a hobo cry? You steal his trash.

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Why did the boy fall of the swing? He had no arms or legs

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"What starts with an 'F' and ends with 'uck'?" "I don't know, what?" "'Firetruck.'"

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Theres a tomatoe a cucumber and a mouth. HA

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What's funny about a small child with no arms, no legs? Nothing.. Nothing at all.

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In the middle of english class, Little Timmy raised his hand and asked "Can I use the restroom" The english teacher said " I don't know, CAN you?" Little Timmy said "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?

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What's brown and sticky? Dog turd

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What is older than history?

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? Its babies were being mauled by a cat.

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Why was the wife laying on the ground crying? Because she wasn't in the kitchen making a sandwich for her husband

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guess what my weiner dog did last night? pooped in my bed

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To visit his wife in the hospital. She has terminal cancer.

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Why didn't the dog come to his master when it was called? It didn't have any legs.

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What do you call a black salesman? A salesman, you racist.

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What does a handsome guy and an ugly girl have in common? Nothing

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Why couldn't the girl go to the bathroom? Because she was obese.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops