How do you make a baby crawl in circles? Nail its hand to the ground

What did the teacher say to the other teacher? We are both teachers. -Del Primm

What did the mother say to her son when she saw his report card? I don't know. I wasn't there.

Your mom is so nerdy that she probably went to college, got her degree, then found a very successful job in a field that she finds interesting.

Okay, you seem sincere enough, thing is that I trust you, but your buddies, if you can vouch for them, then I at least know that you are putting your stepmother in danger if you decide to cover for your friends, besides you being such an emotional crybaby kinda gets me into trusting you again.

Where do you find a dog with no legs ? Same place you left it ...

What do you call a chicken that can't lay eggs? a rooster

What's Green And Has Wheels? Grass, I Was Just Kidding About The Wheels.

Q. What do birds and a mouse have in common... A. Nothing there two different species

Why are there no Jews in hell? Because Hitler is there,

What did the Jew get for Christmas? Nothing

A dyslexic man walks into a bra

Why is it bad luck for a black cat to cross your path? I'll tell you in Heaven

Why did the car crash? Because the driver was blind

Potassium? K.

How do you get the neighborhood hoodlums to stop pushing you over in your wheelchair? Brutally murder their families in front of them.

What is better then fisting? Fisting with a metal studded glove

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other... Uh oh. A car just ran it over.

Roses are Red I shit in your Stew When you eat it The joke is on you

Roses are blue Violets are red It's fascinating what genetic engineering can do

Why did the smoker die at a petrol station? He had lung cancer.

How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't. How did the little girl survive the massacre? She was the killer.

What's the difference between the NBA and the WNBA? What's the WNBA?

You're such a baby, that you are still in diapers! Ew! How would you know creep!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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