Yo mammas so fat she wears big clothes!

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Knock Knock... Who's there? Nine... Nine who? Nine Eleven.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's brown and red? I lied about the red, it's dirt.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did the chicken say when it finally crossed the road? - nothing, its a chicken

thumb_up thumb_down +8

knock knock Goodbye

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do you call a cat with 1 eye, 4 legs, and its tongue out? Road kill.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do you call a Black White supremisist? Well you see the Black man was blind and thought he was a racists redneck. He then contracted cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did the boy say after he stubbed his toe? Owww! I wanna have sex!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +8

How do you make spongebob come to Life? You kiss him????????

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the fat ugly bald Jewish man go to the bank? He needed to take out some cash because he was going out for lunch at a highly recommended restaurant.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Q:What is your maturity on a scale of 1 to 100? A:69

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why does Chuck Norris always know the time? He bought a fancy new watch.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. He had multiple MRI's and bodily fluid tests to confirm the diagnosis. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him. He then donated a vast portion of his wealth to research. 12% of the donated money went into studying the medicinal effects of Twinkies.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

what do you call a girl that just took 15 loads to her face? sasha grey.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why didn't Josh go to school? On his way to school, a majestic flying homeless man hit him in the head with a sea cucumber.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's the difference between your mom and a table? The table has legs.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What is brown and can't get an erection? Poo

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do you call a guy sleeping with little boys? Michael Jackson

thumb_up thumb_down +8

There is a black guy a white guy and a Mexican, whose driving. The other black guy.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's awesome about going to a no-pants party? Getting stabbed 2 times.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

An optimistic person says the glass is half full Pessimistic people say the glass is half empty Engineers say the glass is 2 times the size it needs to be.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

what do you call an octopus with 9 tentacles? a male octopus

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why was the girl called stupid? She is mentally retarded...

thumb_up thumb_down +8

I just started the seafood diet. It consists primarily of eating fish due to its high nutritional content.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops