Listen bitch, get over here, let me poke out your fucking eyeball, and then you tell me if it is reasonable or not to fucking be pissed afterwards! As for your goddamn technique, of course I understand it, I use it too, its the ironman method as far as I am concerned. Do not share it with people here, you can go share it with your little "shadow people" but that shit took years to develop. But yeah, you tell me whatever the hell you consider "reasonable" you get me the money, and then we can see about being "reasonable". I know many of your methods, NLP, hypnosis, covert, warm and cold reading, I know you are no fucking psychic nor do you read minds, stop telling me what the hell your "Order" is, because whatever the hell it is, your "Nero`s" have proven on this site alone, that its a laughingstock that in no way could have brought six hundred people towards liking you, even less six millions.

There is a 5 second long and extremely depressing video, most cant watch it for any longer than 6 seconds

Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

What did the mute person tell the deaf person? Nothing. Even if sound could emit from his vocals the impaired of hearing person would still be unable to respond unless they have taken classes to read lips. The deaf person didn't take classes nor did the mute person learn sign language.

how many large people can you fit in a bath tub ... 1/16

Songs can be interpreted in many different ways you know: "Whenever, Wherever" - Prostitution "You raise me up" could be an advert for Viagra; And as for "love is in the air" - masturbating from a rooftop comes to mind. [L]

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't

I'm tired.

What did Superman say to Batman when they first met? Nothing. They are not real.

pull my finger (farts)

wanna hear a dirty joke? ...trashcan

tim tebow and mark sanchez will lead the jets to the superbowl

three white men are running after a black man,, the black man is winning the race

Whats worse than Lindsey Lohans vagina? Nothing.

What's the oppicite of brown???? Something not brown.

Why couldnt the old man ski? There was no snow.

Hamsters are a lot like cigarettes. They're completely harmless until you put one in your mouth and light it on fire.

Why does Obama not want to get buried? because he's still alive

What did the little boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

Black people are like jelly beans. Nobody likes the black one's.

What do you get when you throw a white hat in the red sea? A wet hat.

There's a Mexican and a black guy in a car... Who's driving? The Cop!!!

Why couldn't Johnny drive? He doesn't have arms or legs. Why didn't Johnny have arms or legs? Johnny is a potato

Why did the chicken cross the road? For no specific reason, Chickens don't think much.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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