Q: What's big and white and can't climb trees? A: a fridge

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? People posting the same joke over and over again.

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Why do firemen wear red suspenders? To keep their pants up

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Q. What's green and will kill you if it falls out of a tree A. A pool table

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So I walked upstairs and I told the guy, "No." And he then asks, "Why?"

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What do You call a black porn star from alaska? By their first or full name depending on your relationship with them and the situation.

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You know what happens when you assume. You jump to a conclusion that could conceivably have severe consequences.

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Why was the baseball player arrested after stealing a base? Because he pulled out a knife and stabbed the shortstop in the chest.

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So a baby seal walks into a club.

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Two muffins are in an oven. Although they both possess the extraordinary ability to speak, strangely each remains silent, apparently lost in their own thoughts. Thus nobody has any reason to think they are any different than any other muffins. Later after they've been baked and allowed to cool, they are sold to a woman who eats them along with a small salad. She enjoys their chewy, hearty texture, and lightly sweet taste. She is completely unaware of what amazing discovery has just been lost to science.

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What rhymes with sloth? Cloth

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A man from florida and a woman from florida go to a restaurant, which isnt very popular.

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What do u get when you cross Napoleon and a stick of dynamite? A very bloody mess.

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"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "Your landlord, clear out your stuff by tuesday"

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Yo' mama so stupid, she has a lower IQ than the average person.

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You are the third derivative of the position function.

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A man walks into a bar, but it's really not his fault because his seeing eye dog led him right into it.

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q: whats fat hairy and always eats mcdonalds a playboy model i lied about everything

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Why do girls wear makeup and perfume? Because they are ugly and smell

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A man walks into a bar, looks to the right and sees a man one foot tall playing the piano, he sits at the bar and says to the bar tender,"I'm feeling kind of down" the bar tender gives him a bottle of very strong alcohol and later that night he goes home and hangs himself.

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Why did the groom have cold feet? Because his socks were slightly damp resulting in evaporation and the cooling of his feet, as well as the cold weather in December.

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what is white and sticky? glue.

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What is the hardest part of a vegtable? The wheel chair 0.o

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What did the giraffe say to the monkey? Nothing

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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