A: What is worse than a melted chocolate bar. B: An eaten one.

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Why did Susie fall off the song? She had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? Not Susie

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Everyone lies about agreeing to the terms of service... look, I'll do it right now! because i have to click it in order to post the joke.

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An Irishman walks into a bar and orders a Coke.

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I'm on the seafood diet, a large proportion of my daily food intake consists of fish.

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I hate you.

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what is sam ross' favorite word to use in conversation? awesam

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A man was drowning in a lake and so he asked God to save him. A man on a boat came by and said to the drowning man "Do you need any help?" The drowning man said "Yes! Thank God a boat came for me!" So the man on the boat pulled the man from the water and saved him.

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Whats the funniest part about 911? Over 1,000 People Died

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You know what the best part about sleeping pills is? No, what is it? Zzzzzzzzzzz

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what do you call a pizza with a lot of jalapenos. spicy.

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What did batman say to robin before they got in the car Get in the car

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What did the Jewish man get for Christmas? Nothing. He is Jewish, therefore he does not celebrate Christmas, he celebrates Hanukkah. So he won't get a present for Christmas, he will get eight presents for Hanukkah. (He'll like getting a good deal).

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Why did polly fall of her swing ??? She had no arms

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Q: Why cant Helen Keller drive? A: Because shes dead.

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Why did Hitler go to the hospital? Because he shot and poisoned himself.

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Why did Hitler smell the flower? Chicken dick.

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What did the little boy say when he was sick? Nothing. He stayed in bed and slept all day.

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A man walks into a bar, orders a few drinks and becomes drunk. the bartender calls a taxi and the man is driven home.

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Why don't seagulls live in the bay? Because then they'd be bagels

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Wher did suzy go after the explosion? everywhere

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Why did the man cross the inerstate? Well, he only got half way till he got hit by a truck, but he wanted to, it was suicide. oh ya, it wasnt a man it was a chicken. oh well. They are both dead.

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What starts with C and ends with UNT. Ciretrunt

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What do you get when you give a homeless man a sandwich? It thrown at the back of your head.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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