Donald Duck walks into a drug store and asks the lady behind the counter for a bag of condoms. So the lady says, "Sure thing sir, would you like me to put that on your bill"? Donald says," THIT(Shit)NO, I'LL THUFFOCATE! (Suffocate)

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Why didn't Avery die when he got hit by a bus? The bus was going three miles per hour.

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A man is at the doctor's office and the doctor says to the man: "I'm sorry sir, you have AIDS and Alzheimer's disease." The man says: "Well, at least I don't have AIDS!"

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How do you make a nerd cry? Give him a 99% on a test.

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"Knock Knock" "Who's There" "The Police" "The Police Who" "Ma'am your son just died in a car accident"

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Why did the mailman say hi to you? He was trying to be friendly

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What were Benjamin Franklin's first words after he died? It's been 225 years and we still don't know yet.

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Have you ever tried grabbing a bottle of 7-up free and walked away with it? Moral: If it says its free, its free ffs!

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Where do babies come from? You fathers penis.

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What do you call it when Justin Beiber has sex with a girl? Consensual sexual intercourse between two young adults.

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Q.How do you get a dog to meow ? A. Put the dog in the freezer overnight . . Get a chainsaw and run it along his back in the morning . " Meowrrrr..."

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poopy is poopy

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God told John to come forth and recieve internal golry forever. John came fifth and recieved a toaster.

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What's the difference between a sewer pipe and a French fry? A lot

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Yo momma so fat, when she steps on the scales it reads 90kg

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i have no friends actually now i fell bad ... anybody spare money for the bus ahhhhhhh kill me now

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one time at band camp there was a guy guess what he played? no one knows

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What's the difference between a Jew and an apple? One of them is a fruit, and the other is not.

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The diamond one below is hilarious.

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Why didn't the lady answer the phone? She is deaf and mute.

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Why did the pig cross the road? To chase after his adopted chicken.

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whats worse then getting a bad present on your birthday? dying.

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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Knock Knock Who's There Trick or Treat!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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