A bear wakes up from hibernation and is hungry. He sees a nearby forest cabin and decides to see if he can find food inside. The bear breaks into the cabin and thus the people staying there frantically run away to call animal control.

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? The answer is not definitive and involves several factors including the size of the woodchuck, the woodchuck's teeth, the climate in which that woodchuck lives, and the tenacity of that particular woodchuck at achieving his goal.

Pete and Repeat are sitting on a bridge, Pete fell off and Repeat still hasn't been able to forgive himself for pressuring Pete to join him on such a perilous perch.

i black man walks in to a bar.he askes if he can make out with you? the man says"no. black man says"why? the guy says"because im not homersexal. black man says"oh. boss says"hey i told you dont talk to black people. guy says"no i can ekplan.boss says no more of buts or buy. boss says" you are fired guy says"NO! boss says"yup both of you get out! guys say no two guards come to talk them out. THE END`DONE!

Three blind mice go into a pub, but they are unaware of their surroundings so to derive humour from it would be exploitative.

There is a Asian a black guy and a white guy the black guy loves apples the white guy loves pears and the Asian loves Macaroni the white guy gets a apple the black guy gets a pear and the Asian has no lunch so the black guy kills the white guy for the apple and the Asian kills the black guy because he is hungry

A man walks into a bar…. he then looks around checking to make sure no one saw this abashing action. He sees no one did then plashing a big smile on hst face he begins to strut forward only to trip over an empty can of spray cheese. it is important to note that this spray cheese was low fat

Why do seagulls live by the sea? Because they wouldn't be able to live anywhere else.

How did the Cuban get into Florida? Well he got his passport and other papers, flew in, then went to Customs.

When life gives you lemons, you go to a therapist and seek help because your dementia has progressed to the point that you are seeing and feeling illusions.

What do you call a chicken who eats chicken. Cannibal

A horse, a duck, a pig, and a muslim walk into bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the muslim has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in chicago. The bartender reminds the muslim that he is keeping company with a swine, and the muslim feels offended for the poor horse.

What do you call a black man standing on a podium? Slave trade

Q: Whats different about pizza and jewish people? A: Pizzas don't scream in the oven.

RACIST JOKE Why did the racist cross the road? He wanted to get to the other side.

Why did the little boy chase after his ball? Because it rolled away

Why doesn't Lucinda have a penis? Because she's Mexican.

The Ohio State Buckeyes

why did bob eat the cookie? because he was hungry

Whats worse than finding an actual joke on anti-jokes? A.I.D.S.

What is the difference between a urologist and a can of chili? One is hot and spicy, and the other analyzes urine.

A muslim walks into a gun shop

What's funny? Nick Sotelo

What is green, walks on four legs, and is capable of the strongest bite in the world? An alligator.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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