MILLERS FUNNY LIKE A JEW

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A: How can you tell a tree is an aspen? B: 'Cause of the way it is.

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Two chemist walk into a bar. The Bartender ask them what they want. The first chemist says he wants H20. The second chemist laughs and says he wants H20 too. Then he dies.

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What is a black guys favourite thing to eat? Food.

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What is the best part about having sex with tweny-six year olds. There are twenty of them. ap~pac

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Ever heard of carpel tunnel? Well after that girl it was more like carpal toungal

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Whenever someone asks you why you're sad, always remember this simple answer so that people won't keep asking you more questions: "Because Hitler died"

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When life gives you lemons you are like "how did I get these lemons?"

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What's worse than terminal cancer? Two terminal cancer?

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Yo mammas so fat she wears big clothes!

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What's worse than homework? A basket full of mutilated puppies....

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What did the biker do when he heard about Kony 2012? He became a social activist and did his part by contributing to the cause.

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I had a lemon. hi.

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Not really a anti joke: Superman is flying over town when he suddenly spots a completely naked Spiderwoman moaning and all sweaty while rubbing her her legs, This gets Superman really h0rny but does not want to get caught, so he flies down and bangs away so fast nobody notices a thing a thing and leaves. Spiderwoman: Hey honey whats wrong? Please come lie on top of me again! Invisible Man: AAAAAAARGH!!! IT FEELS LIKE I HAVE A DAMN BOWLING BALL UP MY ASS HOLE!!!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Although this is a highly improbable scenario, one would assume that, being a chicken, it did not have much of an intuitive idea as to what to do while it was stray for whatever reason in an urbanized area. Considering chickens do not harbor nearly as much of a mental capacity as it would require to even comprehend the concept of a "road" and is impervious to the idea of oncoming traffic and such, the fact that it happened to be crossing the road was in fact not even recognized by the chicken. For this reasons I deem this question unanswerable.

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Roses are grey. Violets are grey. There is an entire spectrum of the world I am not privy to.

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A man and his young child walk into a clinic to get physical check-up. The man learns from the physicist he doesn't mater. His wife remarries and start having frequent sex and the child is scarred for life. This is irrelevant because both parents don't exist and this is all a constant delusion in an psychiatric hospital.

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Q: Why did the wihte man buy a burger? A: cuz he was hungry

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What's the difference between an Elephant and a Post Box? An Elephant is not a Post Box. It is an Elephant.

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Knock Knock. who's there? James. well use the doorbell.

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What's big, green, has 4 legs, and if it falls out of a tree will kill you? A pool table

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What's green and says I'm a frog? A talking frog

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There once was a mam from Peru He dreamed he was eating a shoe It wasn't... It was a goat

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Roses are red, violets are blue, shit is brown and so are you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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