My grandmother's zodiac sign was cancer, and she was killed by a giant crab.

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What do you call an asian jumping off of a building? A suicide victim.

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what did the potato say to the apple nothing food can't talk

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What city likes baseball the most? New York

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Why did the cook throw up at McDonalds? Because his pay check was made out to the Ronald McDonald Foundation.

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Why did Carl the cat die? he didnt. he's still alive.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Scientists are still unable to fully understand the brain functioning of chickens enough to comprehend their motives for doing such a thing.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Reality TV.

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Why do gingers get mad when people call them gingers? Because it hurts their feelings

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Why couldn't the color blind orphan find his apple? Because he was also blind.

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If a tree falls on a woman and there is no one around to hear it, she was probably lonely.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the lesbian's house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

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what is the difference between an octopus and a dead dolphin? one as tentacles the other is dead.

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Why did Romney loose the election? Because Obama had more votes

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what's wose than finding a holocaust in your anti-joke? the potential offspring of courtney love and al gore

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What did the asian say to the President of the United States? I don't speak English

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It's really irrelevant when you realize this joke is about a suicidal chicken...

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Call of Duty Infinite Warfare

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What does a spider Pig do? Nothing. They dont exist.

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What goes in dry and comes out wet and sticky? Bubble Gum

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Just aids, and gonnoreah, and... Jk, I wont type it here, and I am not "suffering" from nothing, its a condition, it can be a struggle, and yeah it could turn fatal, on the bright side its not contagious (its genetics, flawed genetics) but on the bright side, so far chances are greater of me dying from a giant meteor falling on me as I sleep, than from this... Not disease, genetic flaw, take it from a guy that was born without toenails, has two eardrums and some weird tiny holes on his ears (I can send you a pic of those tiny weird holes, they are not weird, kinda cute I been told and can say so myself) so you calm yet?

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Why can't Bin laden drive because he's dead

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Where did Sarah go during the bombing? Everywhere.

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Bill: ask me if i am three ducks in a man suit Jim: are you three ducks in a man suit? Bill: yes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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