What did the homeless man get for Christmas? - Nothing This homeless man got a gift for his Birthday. What happened to the gift? - It got stolen the following day What did this homeless man get for New Year? - Still nothing Get real.

Dear Six, Please stop spreading rumors about me and nine. I hear you two also do some pretty nasty things. Love, Seven.

old people are like slinkies...they arent really good for anything but brings a smile to ur face when they're pushed down the stairs...just think about it ;)

Why is Skrillex bad at fishing? Because he always increases the treble input in his songs, and he doesnt have a rod.

Q. Why do some people not like anti-jokes? A. They don't find the humor funny.

Whats funny and has 2 wheels The holocaust, I lied about the wheels, and the funny

What did the farmer say to little susie? I have a gun. Get in the car and dont scream or i will kill you

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A jew is a human being who will understand and laugh at a joke, while a pizza will just sit there because it is only a delicious thing that people eat.

How do you kill a pirate? Throw him of a bridge

Why was the chinese man kicked out of the bar? Because he was under aged

Roses are read Vliolets are bloo I cant spell How about you

What do you call two black men flying an airplane? Pilots.

What would you do for a Klondike Bar? Well I would open the freezer.

I see London. I see France. Show me your boobs.

Why couldn't little Billy fall asleep. Because Billy didn't have any counting skills to be able to coins sheep

Whats better than 1 person in your oven? 9 people in your oven.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because grass don't eat meat.

Know what im sayin'? No but im wearing pants

Q) Why are there no aspirin in the jungle? A) Because it would not be financially viable to attempt to sell pharmaceuticals in the largely unpopulated rainforest

What has 8 legs and 1 eye? 2 chairs and half a fish.

What benefits came from the September 11th attacks? None. It was one of the most horrific tragedies in American History

If you work at Penn State you might want to skip the annual "bring your kid to work day"

i have a black person in my family tree he's still hanginh

I asked my wife to make me a sandwich. I had forgotten she was dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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