Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from a fat emo girl with a knife

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What does Yoko Ono say while rehearsing her song before a concert? She gives directions to the band.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What did Larry do when little Billys baseball crashed through his window? He raped and murdered little Billy for Larry has raped and murdered many children.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What did the kid with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

what do you call a kid with no legs and no arms some one who will nevaer forfill there bucket list cause they cant write it

thumb_up thumb_down +5

what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? i lost my tractor

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Q:what does your face and this site have in common? A:both are poorly constructed

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why cant Sally brush her hair? Because she has leukaemia.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's worse than having cancer? Two people having cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Yo momma so ugly..... what more do you want

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Carlos was attempting to write anti-jokes. He sucks at writing anti-jokes.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What did the drunk homeless man get for his birthday? Liver cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A Priest a Rabbi and a duck walk into a bar. The rest of the patrons continue to drink until the situation seems less strange.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why was the black man crying? His wife left him, took his children, and most of his possessions in the divorce.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

There once was a man named Trevor. Trevor was walking casually through the forest one day. All of a sudden, a wolf leapt out from the trees. The wolf said, in a harsh voice, "Hey man! This is my patch". But then Trevor woke up and realised that his hallucinations were symptoms of a degenerative brain disease.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Do you have ass-thma? Coz your ass is taking my breath away

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken had just escaped from the slaughterhouse where he witnessed the brutal decapitation of his entire family and in his heightened emotional state was unable to map out a safer and more sensible route.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A man walks into a bar after a hard day of work, and he meets this girl and they really kick it off, so the girl says, "lets go somewhere more, private" and they both go to a more secluded bar that has less decibels of noise.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

roses are red violets are blue i take pleasure in the simple things in life as i have nothing else left to live for

thumb_up thumb_down +5

what do German people eat at BBQ ' s ? burgers and hotdogs and kebabs and fried chicken with a garnish of summer salad washed down with a cold mouth tingling glass of coca cola and jews

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why was the boy crying? Because he had a frog stapled to his face

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Q: How many Jews are there in Germany? A: None, they all died in the holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why didn't the boy eat his vegetables? he was dead

thumb_up thumb_down +5

My mother's star sign was Cancer. Ironic how she died really. She was attacked by a giant crab.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops