What is Alqueida's favorite football team? The New York Jets.

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it died. Q: Why did the dog fall out of the tree? A: Because it was tied to the monkey.

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What does a sailboad and a walrus have in common? Nothing.

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Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: To get to the other side.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? A Holocaust survivor. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Daisy's are white, Metallica.

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A homeless guy was walking along the beach when all of a sudden he see's what looked like to be magic genie's lamp so he pick the lamp up whipes it off then sells it for black tar herion.

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whats a parkour kid? someone who jumps off things and is a pre-teen with adhd

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What is the difference between Sarah Jessica Parker and a horse? Sarah Jessica Parker is a human being who is also a very skilled actress A horse is a animal which is usualy kept in a barn

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why did the chicken cross the road? it was making its way home after a long day of luckless job interviews

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Your momma is so black, that her melanin levels are relatively high.

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Two chavs jump off a cliff, who wins? Neither. Leaving aside the fact that two people would jump off a cliff in any kind of competitive context is highly improbable, due to the laws of physics objects fall at the same speed and therefore both people would hit the ground at the same time, meaning that, unless either of them deployed a parachute mid way through, they would, in fact, be in a dead heat.

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what did the little girl with cancer get for christmas? cancer

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wanna hear a clean joke? bob took a bath with bubbles. wanna hear a dirty joke? bubbles was a man :) i heard this somewhere and it made me laugh :)

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Q: What do you call a black man that's flying a plane? A: A pilot.

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"Mommy! Look, I found a turtle!" "that's no turtle." "Oh..."

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But that just reinforces the negative stereotype that women don't have penises.

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I insist, you go ahead. See you around. how about in four six hours?

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Potassium? K.

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Why couldn't the man ever reach his dream of becoming a professional athlete? He was pronounced with Alzheimer at a young age and could never remember his dream the next day.

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What did the blonde say when she fell out of a tree? Nothing, she shattered her trachea upon landing.

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What is better then fisting? Fisting with a metal studded glove

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What is white and tastes like cotton candy? Jizzz

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops