How many dead babies does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Impossible, non-living organisms are incapable of moving and babies lack the brain capacity to understand how to screw in a light bulb.

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A man walks into me and I say: "WATCH IT PUNK!"

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Here's a riddle: What can you catch, but not throw? A really heavy ball, or STDs.

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Roses are black Violets are black Everything is black I'm blind

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Why can't Hellen Keller play the piano? She's dead.

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That would mean that you are not its leader, or that you are, the result would have been the same, if you are the "head honcho" they would have gone for you, and your employees. Now, if you are an employee, they would have gone for your leader, and of course you. So between us and nobody else really its fucking antijoke, are you the leader?

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What do you call a group of white males wearing hoods and setting fires? Cold

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guess what? i dont know, what? i dont know either, i thought you knew.

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What's a worse place to be besides the friendzone? On your grandmas lap crying because your parents just died in a car crash.

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2 wales are at the bar one looks at the other and dose a wale call for 5 long minutes and the other one reply's "dude your drunk we got to go"

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What do you call a white guy with 5 black guys. The owner of a basketball team

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What's worse than a baby on a pitchfork? Two babies on a pitchfork.

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Knock Knock. READ THE DAMN SIGN IT SAYS NO SOLICITORS!!! ... yeah.

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child labor

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your mamma so dumb she makes frankienstien look smart

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If 2 wrongs make a right and 2 rights make a wrong, then when you have 4 rights=2 wrongs, you have a true statement. If you have 8 rights = 4 wrongs, you have a verified statement.

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What did The Black man have for breakfast? Bran Flakes.

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What do you call a Muslim on the moon? An astronaut

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Why isn't Billy Mays on TV anymore? Beacause Billy Mays was in a tradgic accident where a bowling ball fell on his head, and a couple days later he died of head trama. His family can't bear to hear his voice anymore.

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Q: What do you call a dog with no legs? A: It doesn't matter what you call him, he isn't going to come.

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Ubisoft 'Very Impressed' By Pokemon Go, Working on AR game of their own.

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How do you find your way out of the impossible maze? You don't.

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Why did the homosexual cross the road without looking both ways? He was blind......

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what did the McDonald's cashier say to the fat man ordering a large chocolate milkshake? you want some fries with that shake?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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