A family walks into a talent agent's office. They do a cute family-friendly performance that they call "The Aristocrats."

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A man walks into me and I say: "WATCH IT PUNK!"

thumb_up thumb_down +9

I wondered why the piano was getting bigger. Then it hit me... I'm sorry I have visual agnosia

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Q: what's yellow and can't use chopsticks. A: corn

thumb_up thumb_down +9

How did Bill Framex die? He didn't because he isn't real.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

My mother's star sign was Cancer. Ironic how she died really. She was attacked by a giant crab.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What did God say when he made the first black person? I have just added a significant element of diversity to the human species. Intolerance between ethnicities will surely prove to be an obstacle in societal progression, creating hardships for many. I know this because I am God.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the little boy commit suicide? Because his dad molested him.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What did the priest do to the young catholic boy? Bless him.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Knock Knock! Who Is it? You, Tig

thumb_up thumb_down +9

so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Q: A blonde, a red-head, and a brunette all jump off the bridge at the same time. Who hits the ground first? A: As stated by Sir Isaac Newton's third law of gravitation, all three fall to their deaths at the exact same time because the velocity of a falling object is unaffected by the mass of that object... or their hair colour. Idiot.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

:D STORY TIME! :D ... :D So once upon a time there was a... :) Uhm... :\ I forgot... Sorry :(

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Your momma's so stupid that she might not have graduated from high school, ceasing her ability to have an educated job. Now, she makes minimum wage and can barely feed her son.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A ninja is walking down the street then he...finds a puppy a names him rex

thumb_up thumb_down +9

How did the rabbi die? It didnt it lived through the shooting

thumb_up thumb_down +9

My friends a Jehovahs Witness. He got all pissed at me because he tried to tell me a knock knock joke and I ignored him.......i totally stole this joke lol.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Rick Ross is so fat, that he is fatter than someone who isn't as fat as he is.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why does Obama not want to get buried? because he's still alive

thumb_up thumb_down +9

how do you tune a piano, you dont, piano tuners tune a piano, I wasn't talking to you!

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Did you hear about the new XBOX releasing in Mexico. It's called the XBOX JUAN!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Who is a pussy? Jeff Misner

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Whats included in over 90% of all car crashes? A Car

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why DIDN'T the chicken cross the road? Because it got hit by a bus

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops