A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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whats the best joke ever? womens rights

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If I was trapped in a closet with you and a bear, and I only had two bullets, I would shoot you twice!

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how do you get 20 people in a mini? open the door would be a good start but i dont think they will all fit.

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What's the difference between a black cat and a black cat? Nothing.

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what did the Alaskan homeless man get for Christmas? Death

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What do fruits and computers have in common. Microsoft.

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Why did the girl cry? She got hit by a bus.

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Yup, I mean we use all of your techniques and all things considered the messages end up looking pretty much the same, as if the same person had written them, Azure is named Carlos, and well, he is pretty much a computer wiz so you have nothing to worry about.

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Why did the black man buy a gun? Because he and his family live in a dangerous neighborhood.

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And now a word from our sponsors

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What's the same between a bike and a duck? They both have wheels. Except for the duck.

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What did the smoker say when he coughed? Ohhh dam it's turned into a smokers cough

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want more?

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(sniff) (sniff) It smells like gross diarrhea in here... (sniff) (sniff) ... Yeah it does

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What do lawyers and sharks have in common? They both play vital roles in their own society or ecosystem.

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What do you call a kid with one leg and an eye patch? Names

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What did the little boy with no arms and legs get for his birthday? A baseball, bat, and a glove.

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What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the user is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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what do you call the quadriplegic man who went water skiing? Skip

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how many baby's does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard you throw them

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Why did the cat lick the black guy. Because the cat thought it was dirty.

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Why did the girl fall down the stairs? She has no legs, that's why.

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roses are red violets are blue i had sex with your dog

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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