there were ten in the bed and the little one said roll over so they all rolled over and one fell out then got back up and punched the little one in the face saying good night

My mom was telling my brother how much it hurt when she stubbed her toe. He told her she should try child birth.

You smell just like a black person. With your nose.

Want to hear an anti joke? Me too thats why Im on this site.

Bill: Hey Bob guess what? Bob:What? Bill: your adopted

Knock knock Who's there? The bank. We've come to evict you from your house.

the WNBA.

what do u call a lesbian with long hair? a long haired lesbian.

Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? You would too if your name was Gnrwhaf

Q: whats worse than being in the car for 1hour A: being in the car for 2 hours Made by: grant chapman:)

What do you call a schizophrenic Clown surrounded by 10,000 Amish gangsters, all armed with dildos? I don't know, but it would be a heck of a sight, wouldn't it?

Why is Easter better than christmas? Theres a significantly less chance of getting raped by a man in a Santa Claus costume.

What do you put your key on? A key chain.

If the human population held hands around around the equator A significant portion of them would drown.

what did the person with yellow teeth and the person with white teeth have in common? they have a nose.

knock knock whos there? andy andy who? andy gold hi come in

What happens when you wake a sleepwalker? Waking sleepwalkers does not harm them. While it is true that a person may be confused or disoriented for a short time after awakening, this does not cause them further harm. In contrast, sleepwalkers may injure themselves if they trip over objects or lose their balance while sleepwalking. Such injuries are common among sleepwalkers.

How many dyslexics does it take to screw in a light bulb? Dyslexia is a cognitive learning disability characterized by the sufferer's inability to fluently spell, speak and read. Being a intellectual disability, the chances that dyslexia could impair the practical functionality of a sufferer are very slim and hence it it is highly probable that it would only take one dyslexic to change a light bulb in the simplest of conditions. However, to definitively answer this question, I would have to know a range of variables such as the height above the ground at which the light socket is mounted, the physical height of the dyslexic, the voltage and amp characteristics of the light-bulb itself, the physical well-being of the dyslexic etc. These variables are unknown, are not mentioned in the initial question (as is common for this type of question) and hence, I cannot answer this question to any degree of accuracy.

A man on an airplane is extremely frustrated by a small, screaming child. He puts on his headphones and listens to music.

Why is Helen Keller Blind and Deaf? Because she can't drive!... oh no wait I screwed that up.

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

What's funnier than the Holocaust? HA!

Why can't Jeff drive a car? because he is a rock.

What did Wonder Woman say to Superman? I'm wonder woman.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...