Why did the chicken cross the road? He had to get to the other side.

How do you make a 5 year old cry? Kill their parents.

what does a jet and plane have in common? the letter "e"

I thought about taking a nice warm shower, but then I realized that the power was out and it would probably be a cold shower.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was simply wandering around and happened to walk from one side of the road to the other.

there are two muffins in an oven one muffin says "whoa, its hot in here!" the other says nothing, because it is a muffin, and the other muffin, in reality, said nothing either.

Two great white sharks are swimming in the ocean together, one turns to the other to speak, but doesn't because sharks can't talk.

What do you call a mexican with a driveable lawnmower? Rather wealthy.. He must have a secure job to pay for a home with a lawn, and a lawnmower.

What's worst then a road kill? Multiple road kils.

Good job, son.

...................__ ............./´¯/'...'/´¯¯`·¸ ........../'/.../..../......./¨¯\ ........('(...´...´.... ¯~/'...') .........\.................'...../ ..........''...\.......... _.·´ ............\..............( BroFist

Why cant Helen Keller driver? She's a woman

The Americans have just spent millions of dollars working on a pen that works in space. I would of just used a pencil.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She was dead

A man walks into a butchers and asks for a loaf of bread the butcher replies " no im a butcher" The man says " its ok my bikes outside"

Can you spot the polar bear Probably not because global warming killed it

what do all black jokes start with (look left look right)

What do you do to become a hairdresser? Set Off the fire alarm

How many blondes does it take to change a diaper? About a thousand

A man had two kids who he loved very much but would always come home in a bad mood. On a Friday after returning home, he tells his wife, "I hate my life," then proceeds to take his anger out on her. If you were expecting for this to be a joke, then you clearly have some messed up humor. Abuse in the household isn't to be taken lightly.

Who always participates in "No shave November"? The homeless.

What do you call a homosexual in a wheelchair? A cripple

Because the tractor hadn't seen the chicken.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have Ebola, You're going to die.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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