A bear walks into a bar. There were 4 fatalities and 3 were taken to the hospital.

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Two guys were sitting in a pub.

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Why'd the girl commit suicide? Because Justin Bieber admitted he was gay.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Madame. Madame who? Just kidding it's Steve, but my damn foot's stuck in the door.

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side why didnt the chicken cross back? for the first time in his life, Clucky the chicken, felt liberated. his cruel life flashed before his eyes, forcing him to remember all the bad tines he had spent on the McKinley farm. all the eggs stolen from him, watching all his friends being taken for slaughter. it all came back. from the other side of the road, Clucky saw a place he never wanted to go back to, a place he wanted to forget. the day he chose not to cross back was the first real day in Clucky's life.

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What's a Mexican who walks down the street called? A pedestrian.

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Why did the man break into the bank? Because he was a bank robber

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Why did the girl fall off the swing set? Because she had no arms.

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How many gays does it take to turn a lightbulb? 1

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What did the girl with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Raped

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Why do firemen wear red suspenders? To keep their pants up.

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What's the difference between a zombie, a vampire and a werewolf? One is a zombie, one is a vampire and one is a werewolf.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Fed-Ex. We have a package for you.

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Ya well your momma's so hot...I'd bang her

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did you ever see a butter fly?

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Why was the child in the clown's car? Because the clown was a serial killer and abducted the child while he was at soccer practice, the child then raped and murdered

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If life hands you lemons Take them

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what did the 0 say to the 8 nice belt

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Why did the doctor wear glasses? Because he was a whale.

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What's the difference between an Asian driver and a Belgian prostitute? Nothing at all: Marie-Edith Yang is proud of her mixed heritage, and earns a decent wage in a relatively clean brothel in the lovely little medieval town of Bruges.

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Knock knock Nobody's home.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Dyeing.

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A black succeeds

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What did the Scorpio say to the Aquarius? "How's Uranus? Ohhhhh!" The Aquarius replied: "I have maggots."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops