What do you call a old guy watching little kids in a pool? a life guard

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Living through the Holocaust and finding a time machine to take you back to the beginning of it again.

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Q: What did the Black Man say to the Mexican Fellow Guy? A: Hello.

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One day, a mother was talking with her three daughters. "Mommy," the first one asked, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we took you home, a daisy fell on your head." "Mommy," the second one said, "Why did you name me Rose?" "Because when we took you home, a rose fell on your head." ..."MMMBBWWAAAAAGGGHH!" the third daughter cried. She was born with severe cognitive damage and is incapable of coherent speech.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because his parents died.

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Uncle Eugene enjoyed to drive. Then he was killed in a car crash.

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Everyone lies about agreeing to the terms of service... look, I'll do it right now! because i have to click it in order to post the joke.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue It is Valentines Day So I had to get them for you or we would get into a big fight, which will end up with me on the couch.

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Roses are blue, Violets are green, I am color blind, You have cancer.

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How do you stop a bus? Put the brakes on.

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Q: why did timmy fall over? A: he was hit by a plane

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How does a blonde get pregnant? (I don't know) And you thought blondes were dumb.

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if justin beiber was dating a girl what would you call him? a lesbian

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crips r blue bloodz r red choose crips nd thn ur dead (bloodz swoopp)

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What's a four letter word that ends with "rape"? Stop.

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what do you call a black doctor ? a doctor moron

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A baby seal walks in to a club

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Why did the man float in the lake? Because he was dead.

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Why doesn't Santa have any children? Because Santa doesn't exist.

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A rat scurries into a bar. Six days later, all of the people in that bar die of bubonic plague.

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A black guy walks up to a drug dealer. He asked the drug dealer for directions and went on with his life.

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What do you get when you give a homeless man a sandwich? It thrown at the back of your head.

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Q: Why did the boy cry? A: He was denied access into heaven

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a man eats at a restaraunt alone, because all the people he loved died in a tragic boating accident while he was out of town on a business trip

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops