why does the pie have apples in it? it was apple pie.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Hey how is your wife and my kids

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What happens when you mix bleach and ammonia? You eventually die of respiratory failure from inhaling chlorine gas and possibly an exploding toilet.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the woman make the man a sandwich? Because the man severed his spinal cord and is no longer able to move any of his limbs.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's the difference between Jesus and a painting? It only takes one nail to hang up a painting.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How many alcoholics does it take to change a light bulb? Look. I just enjoy a few drinks every now and then. I mean, I can quit whenever I want to. That's no reason to start people calling names.. Wait, no. That's not.. Look. How much do you drink every day, huh? Why not ask that? And why do I have to be the one changing your stupid light bulb? If it's sooooo important that the light bulb be changed, do it yourself, you lazy bastard. Don't rely on other people to do your work for you.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's worse than finding a dead baby in a dumpster? Recognizing the baby as your missing child, and finding the corpse of your dead wife next to it.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

what do you call an octopus with 9 tentacles? a male octopus

thumb_up thumb_down +13

So Superman walks into a bar right, WRONG, Superman flies into bar

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What do you call a person who is deaf. It doesn't matter, they wont be able to hear it when you call them.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

why did the plane crash? because the pilot was a tomato.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Whats worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into a worm and finding an apple.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Tyrone is innocent! I can't wait until Kirsty gets hers!

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Two peanuts were walking down the street..........pepper.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left it.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Q: whats white and smells like shit A: my ass

thumb_up thumb_down +13

jacob mckeand broke his arm and now he cant wank :(:(:(

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Jack Stevens

thumb_up thumb_down +11

what's wose than finding a holocaust in your anti-joke? the potential offspring of courtney love and al gore

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What did I say to my mum this morning? Good morning.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Refridgerator.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the kid fall off his bike? His mum threw a fridge at him.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Wanna hear a race joke?.....whoops, ya missed it

thumb_up thumb_down +11

haha

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops