You know what topping goes bad with ice cream? Chloroform

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Why is Megan Fox so hot? Because the air conditioning broke.

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What did the Taliban teenager strap on his chest before getting on the bus? A blue rubber dildo.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was struck by a car and killed instantly by the impact.

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Why did the black man drop his weed Because he got shot

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You wanna know who else messes around a lot? My mom. Do you know who else has the best tacos in town? My mom. Do you know who else doesn't have time for this? My mom. She's a very busy woman; dealing with matters you'd expect a recently divorced mother would have to carry on her shoulders.

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How do you stop a little boy from annoying you? You chop his balls of. Why was the little boy sad? Because someone chopped his balls off.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding worms in your stool.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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What's green and eats nuts? Syphilis.

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Why is the sky blue? You like men.

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What's sadder than a lost puppy? A dead puppy.

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What can be smooth but also rough? Endoplasmic Reticulum

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haiku's are funny. but sometimes they don't make sense. refrigerator.

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Can a match box? No, but a tin can.

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What is worse than the holocaust paying taxes

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What does a gay horse eat? Low-energy foods should only be fed to horses who are not regularly being worked and participating in high performance. According to the University of Kentucky's College of Agriculture, energy is vital to horses who need to perform their best as it aids many of the body's functions including muscle contraction, respiration and circulation. Only feed a low-energy diet to an idle horse and feed a high-energy diet to an older or sickly horse and to a working horse.

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What happens when you cut a body in half? An erection.

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What's worse then the bomb that went off in boston? The second one right after.

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What is orange and smells like oranges? Oranges.

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Patrick, I just thought of something funnier than 24. Lemme hear it. 25.

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What long black and tasty? Licorice

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What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick.

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Your mother is so fat that when she goes to the movies, she usually orders popcorn and maybe a drink.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops