Schrodinger's cat walks into a bar. And doesn't.

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Why was the wife disappointed in her husband? He hasn't been very talkative since the suicide.

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Why was the little boy late for school? Because he was hit by a truck.

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Why didn't the scientist discover a cure for apathy? He simply lost interest in it.

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Roses are Green Violets are Black Everything's different since I took crack

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What did the fat man say to everyone? Hey everyone! I am i fat man!

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There are two jews in an oven. One says "It sure is hot in here" and the other says "AHH A TALKING JEW"

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Why did the African cross the road? Because he was searching for his family after his village was massacred by rebel soldiers.

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What did the man say when he lost his car? Where the fuck did my car go

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Whats worse than failing an English test? finding out your now exgirlfriend has aids.

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Knock Knock. Whose there? The IRS. All your base are belong to us.

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Go to this website and this game is an antijoke to laugh at http://iamhelenkeller.com/

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A muslim and a jew walk into a bar. The muslim proceeds to detonate the bomb he had strapped to his chest, killing himself and dozens of bar patrons.

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Whats long and hard? a baseball bat

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Whats faster than a black guy with a tv? His brother who is a dentist and drives a fast sports car.

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what did the cow say to shabab?....... want some milk

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Q: What happens when you divide by zero. A: You get a complex kind of infinite.

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on a scale from 0 to 100, how childish are you? 69

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Two black guys are in a car. Who is driving? One of the black guys.

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A man walks into a bar and sees that the pianist is just twelve inches tall. He asks the bartender, ''How come you have a 12-inch pianist?'' The bartender replies, ''We have a genie in the back room. He'll answer all your wishes, but be careful, because he has a little trouble hearing.'' The man walks into the back room and asks the genie for a million bucks. The genie then gives him a million ducks. The man comes out and tells the bartender that the genie misheard his wish. The bartender says, ''Come on, now! Do you really think I asked for a 12-inch pianist?!''

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What do you call a guy who stabs cereal? A cereal killer.

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Why was the little girl crying? There was a frog stapled to her forehead.

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Why did the bear turn red? Because he was emBEARessed. Nah just kidding, a hunter shot him.

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A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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