Tom buys his wife Mary the latest Eco friendly car. The car is said to get well over 100 miles on a tank of gas. A week later, Tom is stunned to learn that while Mary was driving to the supermarket the car ran out of gas. The tank was full and Mary only drove 5 miles. How is this possible? Mary was involved in a horrible car accident. The gas tank immediately emptied and set fire to Mary and her baby.

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If at first you don't succeed, go kill yourself

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3 men walk into a bar, and the fourth guy behind them had the sense to duck under it.

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Why does the kid cries when he sees me? Cuz i took his lollypop last week.

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I was walking down the road yesterday with only 1 shoe. A man stops by and says "Did you know that you lost a shoe?" I reply "No I didn't. I found 1."

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"Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "I am." "Okay, come in."

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What did the girl with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A bike!

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What do Alzheimer patients think of the internet. Happy pi day.

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What's worse than one cat stuck in a tree? Getting raped

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What do you call a black person who puts out fires? a firefighter

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says 'Why the long face?' The horse says 'My alcoholism is destroying my family.'

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How many black people does it take to solve a complex physics equation? Trick question

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A squirrel walks up to a tree and says "I forgot to store my nuts for winter now I am dead". Ha! It's funny because the squirrel gets dead.

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2 bald men are standing on an oval, one turns to the other and says "leukemia."

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Q: What did the black kid get for Chirstmas? A: Your bike

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure

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What do you call three Asian people eating a cat? A tragic last resort for a starving family.

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What do friends and trees have in common? They will fall over if you hit them repeatedly with an axe.

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A horse walks into a bar and Shits John Taffer is Pissed

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Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme But this one doesnt

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How do you find the richest person in Mexico? You take a survey of all citizens that live in the country of Mexico, find the wealth of each individual person, and whoever has the most money is the richest person in Mexico.

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what is worse than 10 dead babies in a trash can? 11 dead babies in a trash can

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What did the monkey say to the newlywed couple? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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Wanna hear a really dirty joke the boy fell in the mud

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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