why can't johnny compete in the track race? because he has no feet.

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What did the duck say? Nothing. Everyone knows that ducks can't talk.

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I'm pretty sure this site has been taken over by 12 year olds... None of these are funny

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An Ethiopian fell into an alligator infested river. He ate 7 of them before he got out.

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What do you call a discrase of a living enviorment? African huts there so muddy

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What's big and green and I gets stuck in your teeth will kill you? A tractor

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What would you do for a klondike bar? Walk to the corner store to buy one.

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why did the girl die. because she was bullied and abused everyday by her family and friends. she was homeless and was forced to drop a bomb on her own forest. there fore she stabbed herself.

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What did the hose say to the sprinkler? I'm gonna squirt you.

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your mom is so ugly, when she throws a boomerang it doesn't come back

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How many sheets did the Asian want on his bed? "You sheet on my bed I kill you!"

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What do Kurt Cobain and a whale have in common? Both have holes in the back of their heads

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what happens when a mexican makes love to an octopus? It makes a freaking weird looking animal

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Obama Getting Re-Elected.

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Person 1: knock knock Person 2: Who's there? Person 1: nobody Person 2: nobody who? Person 1: ............

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Your mama's so stupid, she gave birth to YOU.

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Why do black people have white palms? Genetics.

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Why did the man ask the woman on a date? They were both single and looking for a unique, romantic experience that could possibly turn into a long-term loving relationship.

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What's the best way to make people notice you? Begin a cult that follows some crazy religious division and go on mass murdering sprees, looting, murdering, and raping everything that moves. Your prime targets should be schools, orphanages, and hospitals (maternity wards for bonus points). Eventually, walk up to the FBI unarmed and have them capture you. Then demand that you get interviewed, as you have instructed your followers that if you don't get to speak on public television, they will bomb multiple major cities. When they put you on TV, simply stare at the camera and say: "Senpai. The time has finally come for you to notice me." Then, because you are a cruel, heartless bastard with no morals whatsoever, have your men bomb the major cities anyway. Have fun!

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There were two blondes going to California for the summer, they are about two hours into the flight and the pilot gets on the intercom and says we just lost an engine but it is all right we have three more but it will take us an hour longer. A half hour later he gets on the intercom again and says we just lost another engine but its all right we have two more it will take us another half hour though. One of the blondes says "If we lose the two last engines we will be up here all day"

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"Everyone be very quite. Dont say a word or well get eaten by the big, fat stupid ugly fat faced dinosaur in that cave over there." "A word or well get eaten by the big fat stupid ugly fat faced dinosaur in that cave over there." "Look how clever Charles is now were all screwed."

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96 right now there mad at each other but pretty soon it will look like this 69

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Why was the boy sad? Because his dad was a serious alcoholic who refused to go to rehab. Being an alcoholic constantly led to him beating the boy and his mother. Eventually, the boy couldn't handle this anymore, and he committed suicide. Realizing what he had done, the father also committed suicide. The mother is now locked away in a mental hospital, for she couldn't hold grasp of the deaths of her husband, and her son.

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What headphones does the farmer use? He is going through a financial struggle at the moment and cannot afford such a luxury.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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