What's the difference between a pizza and a Jew? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Paint yourself green and throw forks at her.

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What did the dead guy say to the other guy? "You murdered me." How did he hear the dead guy? He was dead too.

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Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

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Roses are Red Violets or Red Trees are Red HOLY SH*T MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE!

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HEY YOU! TISSUE!

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Q) What is black, white, and red all over? A) A zebra that just became the kill of a hungry carnivore

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven brutally raped and murder six's parents whilst six hid in the closet and watched.

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A blonde woman is creating an account for a website when she gets the "enter the following" box. The box says"How are you". She looks down at the bottom seeing the answer and puts"Good!".

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Why is Joe is ugly? I dont Know

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why are black people scared of chain saws? because it goes runnigganigganiggarunnigganigganigga

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Take part of what?

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What do u call a gay dinosaur Tyran a sore arse

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how do you delete your joke off anti-joke? you don't.

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im telling maguire

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A man walks into a bar He wakes up from his coma 21 years later and learns that humans now serve pumpkins as gods.

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Why do black people have white palms? Genetics.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You pour cold water on her head or make a loud noise nearby.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was trying to escape from the sad and depressing environment that surrounded him on the side he thus came from. Alas, he did not know that he would be soon hit by a drunk truck driver, who would also die, in a bright explosion of morbid flames and screams.

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What did the little boy get after falling and hitting his face on the ground? A prolonged nosebleed. And Leukemia.

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why did the boy scream? because he got shot.

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If Johnny has 4 dollars and Clarissa has 7 dollars, how many dollars do they have all together? 11 dollars Knock knock Who's There? Johnny Johnny who? Johnny and Clarrisa, all together we have 11 dollars.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, if you had a pulmonary embolism, you would be too

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A man walks into a bar. Three weeks later he gets a liver transplant.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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