"knock knock" "who's there" "Chuck" "Get out of here Chuck I hate you!"

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A man asked Alexander the Great if he was gay, yet Alexander the Great was not offended. Why? Because "gay" has a rather different connotation than in the modern world than it did in earlier time periods where it meant "happy". Also, Macedonians, Alexander the Great's native people, did not speak English so he would not understand the question. Also Alexander the Great was gay in the sense that he was actually a homosexual.

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Your mumma is so fat that she wears large clothes.

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How do you discover a gay snowman? If the carrot is in the ass.

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What is the similarity between John W. Booth and Pee Wee Herman? They both got arrested for shooting someone in the back of the head in the theater.

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What happened to the man that walked into the bar... He walked into the bar

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I did it. the Bulls fan Took a few hours on Microsoft word. then I copy and pasted it on this!

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wheres an unexpected place to find sand? a human pancreas.

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how do you make a clown sad? you push it off a swing.

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Emily Scarpello...Fat Couch

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What's green, covered in cookie crumbs, and lies in a ditch? A Girl Scout that was hit by a car.

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Q:John has 50 candy bars and he eats 45, what does john have? A: Diabetes

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Don't you just hate it when a sentence doesn't end the way you octopus?

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boys go to college to get more knowledge. Girls go to Jupiter to work in the kitchen.

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Why did the sloth fall out of the tree? Because sloths often confuse their arm with a branch, grab on and fall to their deaths.

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******************************************************** Okay, so there were two muffins in the oven. One muffin said, "Oh my gosh! We're gonna die!" The other muffin said, "Whoa a talking muffin!" **********************************************************

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what's better than being stabbed in the testicles with a biro? the Silversun Pickup's album Neck of the Woods

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What do you call a bear with no teeth? A Gummy Bear!!

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Texter 1: Hey, do you want to hang out? Texter 2: Sorry dude, i lost my phone, i'm trying to find it Texter 1: Ok, text me when you find it Texter 2: OK

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What did the hobo get for christmas? Nothing.

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i dont fisish anythi

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Why couldn't the kitten drink its milk? Because its owner was neglecting him and the kitten later died of malnurisment

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What do you say to a corpse? How's life?

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What do skeet disks and Jewish babies have in common? Hitler used to shoot them out of the sky.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops