What's the difference between a snake, and a lawyer? A snake cannot comprehend law, nor can one attend law school and set up an office. They are also different species.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue; In Soviet Russia, POEM WRITES YOU!

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Whats worse then walking into a door? getting shot in the head by a 10ft squirrel holding 44.magnum and a slice of cheese in the other

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A horse, a duck, a pig, and an arab walk into a bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the arab has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in Chicago. The bartender reminds the arab that he's with a swine, and the arab is offended for the poor horse.

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What did the businessman do to get a promotion? He traded oral sex for his male bosses kind heart...

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How did the person die? He got hit by a car.

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why did Michael Jackson cross the road? He didnt he is dead.

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why was Michael Jackson at K-Mart? They offer high quality items at a reasonable price and lay-away during the holidays.

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You know what sucks? A vacuum.

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A middle aged woman walks into a bar. Its Friday and there is a breeze in the air. She leaves shortly thereafter.

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A little boy was walking down the street when a strange looking van stopped next to him and the man driving asked the little boy where he lived, where his mother was, and if he wanted a puppy because he had some in the back seat.... The boy proceeded to enter the van. The man then handed the child a puppy and promptly drove the boy home.

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How do you make a baby cry? You throw bricks at its face.

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I saw a stray dog the other day So I petted it and got on my way.

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knock knock who's there? the man the man who? the man who murdered your whole family

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Q: What's worse than biting into and apple and finding a worm? A: being severely malnourished, thus physically inept to do most simple tasks

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Disreguard Females Aquire Currency

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What is big has a red nose and is funny Don't ask me I have never been out of my house

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Q: How do you confuse a blond A: You don't they are born that way

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Two peanuts were walking down the street..........pepper.

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How do I become successful like you dad? Just do good.

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Why did Justin Bieber jump out of the airplane? He didn't, i pushed him

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Just checked my Tesco burgers in the fridge and they're still within the use by date.

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What is yellow and dangerous? Shark infested butter

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Guest: "Why does your dog sit there and watch me eat?" Hotel Host: "I can't imagine, unless it's because you have the plate he usually eats from."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops