Roses are red violets are next thing you know my D*** is in you

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Q: What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: The holocaust

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knock knock. who's there? I am. I am who? I am pregnant

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Two oranges walking down the street, one says to the other, "Where do you live?". The other replies "I'm not telling you, you'll steel my washing"

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What do you call a black man in an expensive car? A licensed driver.

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How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? Just one.

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A duck walked up to a bad hearing drug dealer, and dealer asked duck, "What you do want?" A duck said, "Quack!" So dealer gave duck a crack

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son, you're adopted.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because someone was chasing it.

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What did the dog do when it raised its leg? It peed.

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What happened when a fish rode a bike? It fell off and injured itself.

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A baby seal walks in to a club

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Your mother is so fat, that she's working really hard to get back in shape so that she can support her family.

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some one knocked on tims door, at the same exact time, someone died in africa

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What's worse than forgetting how to spell? asghasonbma.

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Why did the woman die? She was hit by a bus.

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So a baby seal walks into a club.

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What side of the cheetah has the most spots? -The outside.

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What starts with C and ends with UNT. Ciretrunt

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what did the clinically depressed man last post on twitter? "Oh cruel world, i finally lost all faith in the good of humanity. I am unloved and irrelevant to all. I know nobody will miss me, but goodbye anyway. #suicide " nobody followed him and saw the post and he died alone with nobody at his funeral.

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Kate

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How did sally fall off the swings? she had no arms. Knock knock, who is there? Not sally.

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Oh...okay, good.

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What has two wings and a halo? A chinese phone. WING WING HALO?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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