Knock, knock. Who's there? Me, your friend George! You don't remember me! Oh. Sorry. I'm kidding. I'm a robber.

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ProX hacker JazZ Has aids hahahaha

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Why is 6 scared of 7? Because last year, when 6 was going to the gas station, 7 approached him and said "gimme all your money or else I'll shoot you". 6 was so scared he ran away crying. About a few days later 6 spots 7 again and this time he was with 9. He said "yo 6! If you don't give me your money, im gonna do this to you!" and then 7 started biting and chewing 9 as if he was some kind of cannibal. 6 ran away and called the police. He told him that 7 ate 9.

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What do you call an underground train full of professors? It's very unlikely that the passengers on an underground train would consist entirely of professors, unless it was a special service booked solely for the attendees of highly specialised lectures which required each audience member to have completed a professorship.

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What do a software designer, a civil engineer, an airline pilot, and a long-distance swimmer's support team have in common? All of them use angles and trigonometric ratios to help solve problems.

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Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue I Have ADD ...

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Two doctors were performing open heart surgery on a 54-year old woman. The surgery was a success, and she is now living comfortably in Portland, OR. She enjoys sweet tea.

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Anti-Joke is a sticky wicket.

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what's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? they have different colored hair

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Why couldn't Jesus get a driver's license? Because automobiles did not exist 2000 years ago.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? An Irishman with a metal bar (like a pole)

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Why did the legless person roll down a hill? Because he was in a wheelchair

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What do you call a piece of celery with peanut butter on it? your moms dead

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Oh my god it's the twinkie mobile!

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What do all homosexuals have in common? Not much.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have a short term memory Roses are red

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what do jews, blacks, and asians have in common? they have all been targets of racism!

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Why did the boy break his leg? Because he fell off a building

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My diick won't stop barking unless I take it for a walk, problem is, I can't find a leash big enough

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"I want a boyfriend for these cold winter nights" ... Shut up you slut go buy a blanket.

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what did the lawyer say to the lawyer? "whats up lawyer?" what did the banana say to the banana? nothing bananas dint talk...

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What's the easiest way to get a cat out of a tree? Call the fire department and allow them to safely reach the cat and properly extract it from the tree while you watch from below.

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When did the ball-room finally close? Closing time.

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Why cant the asian find his family? His eyes were too squinty

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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